Birth Story of Transformation - Breaking Family Cycle of Negativity and Fear Around Birth

I wanted to share a wonderful birth story shared with us from a mama in our online support group Kelsey Rose....as she really transformed her story of fear and negativity around birth, that she grew up with and has a very different story to tell her daughter. She prepared so much, but she was determined, and did it!!!

Hey Anne,

I had my baby girl this morning! I went into labor yesterday morning with contractions 5 minutes apart. I had no bloody show, no mucus plug and no water breaking! I was only 1 cm dilated so they sent me home. I was pretty bummed but I went back 5 hours later (because they became unbearable and happened every time I stood up) and was 7 cm! I was shocked. I ended up getting an epidural at 8cm because my labor was stalling as I kept tensing up from the pain. I knew I couldn’t go on anymore. Within 3 hours I was fully dilated and pushed her out after only a few pushes! They were shocked at how fast I was able to push her out with an epidural and being a first time mom. The nurse had to catch her because the midwife couldn’t come in time! It was her first time catching a baby LOL. And I had no stitches or tearing! Such a huge relief! I’m so glad I can share this great story with her one day and break the cycle of fear around birth that I grew up with.

I am very proud of myself and Luna we got through it together and healthy. She’s doing so well. I would be honored if you shared my story! I felt so discouraged because I had no signs leading up to labor and started at just 1cm when I was checked. It felt amazing when I was told I went to 7cm so quickly even with zero signs of labor before that! I hope it can give other women some comfort to know that it’s possible to go from 0 to 100 so quickly! I’ve already taken many pictures LOL so I can post one to the group or email to you. Thanks again. I actually received the second edition of your Natural Birth Secrets book on Monday and spent the day going through it while I was having my sporadic contractions. It helped boost up my confidence and was perfect timing for the labor that came the next morning!

Now that breastfeeding is starting to be a bit less painful and I’m slowly adjusting to the lack of sleep, I’m coherent enough to add to my story that my whole life I was raised being told by my mother how horrible her labor with me was, how it was the worst and most painful experience of her life, and how it’s the reason she never had any other children. She gave birth in a hospital and from what she told me, I could tell that she really wasn’t given any options and had the unfortunately all-too-common traumatic hospital birth experience.

Since finding out I was pregnant, I was determined not to let her traumatic experience become my own. It all started with me looking into hypnobirthing. From there I went down the rabbit hole of reading and watching positive birth stories, reading several birth prep books and taking two birth courses (one was your Love Your Birth course that was helpful because she addressed both the physical processes and anatomy of birth but also the spiritual and psychological component), a newborn care course and a breastfeeding course. I was determined to get as much knowledge as possible to empower myself so that I knew what to expect going into labor, especially since I wanted a hospital birth. In my quest for knowledge I came across you, Anne when I saw an interview you had on Successful Breastfeeding LLC’s webinar series with Kelly Maher Carvell. I really liked how you spoke about birth and the preparation for it so holistically and described it as a challenging yet wonderful experience when surrounded by the right support system. It was the first time I had ever heard of birth spoken about in such beautiful terms instead of as a horrible nightmare. I strongly encourage all expecting mamas to empower themselves with knowledge so that birth is not a mysterious or scary event that you hope to just figure out when the time comes. Yes, I now believe that we were made to do this and that we can do this, but I also firmly believe that it takes a lot of preparation because we no longer live in societies where we are surrounded by birth (as is often said by you, Anne) and instead our society has taught us to be afraid of birth because it portrays only the worst depictions of birth for entertainment and shock value. I think all births, whether in a hospital or at home, medicated or unmediated, natural or cesarean can be beautiful experiences for any woman when she is surrounded by the right team and support system and is empowered with knowledge and confidence.

I thought of my grandma leading up to the birth and a few times during (who gave birth to all of her babies at home back in her country), but I think I was more focused on women in general being able to birth their babies. The doula who helped me had positive affirmation cards and one of them that I asked her to put on the wall while I was there was “Like millions of women before me, my body knows how to birth" (from your online course!).

Thank you so much for your continued support. I look forward to seeing you next month -to the future meetings (in your online support group)

I am excited to announce that my online Love Your Birth course has been improved and updated on a different host site with a lot of bonus video content (15 more videos on key topics!) at the same old pricing. Those who have already purchased it, please contact me through this site for new log in, as you all have lifetime access. Thank you to Megan Hancock Photography who has provided the stunning images for my website.

Singing and Dancing My Way to Natural Birth With Pre-Eclampsia

My heartfelt thanks for reading my story. I'm so blessed and honored that you will post my birth story on your blog and social media.  I hope and pray that this would inspire more women to try birthing naturally and perhaps encourage them also to sing and dance their way through labor! 

I was diagnosed with Pre-Eclampsia with severe features due to the extremely high amount of protein in my urine. My blood pressure remained normal, below 120/80, all throughout my labor, delivery & recovery. This is my 5th pregnancy. My first pregnancy was with twins.  The 1st twin, Annalise, was born naturally (no anesthesia, IV, oxygen, pain meds) in our church's birthing clinic.  The 2nd twin, Therese, was born via CS in a hospital. I was transferred because Therese went transverse when Annalise came out and it was Therese's hand that first came out.  My midwife put her hand back twice before transferring us to the hospital.  

In most hospitals, 24 hour monitoring is only done in the High Risk unit, so when my fluid was low, I had to be monitored for a full 24 hours before I transferred to a regular room.  I went back to the High Risk unit again for the Magnesium sulfate, to counter possible seizure or convulsions, according to my OB.  They also don't allow the natural birthing suite for high-risk cases like mine, because I already underwent Caesarean in a previous pregnancy, even though I've already had 3 VBACs.

Valentine’s Day, Thursday, Feb. 14, 2019, I was looking forward to a lovely dinner that night with my husband of 13 years, Ritche, to celebrate our 15th year of being together, when we received news that my husband’s 98-year old maternal grandmother “Lola Auring,” whom he was very close to, had just passed away peacefully in her sleep.  He regretted not being able to visit her sooner when she was still alive but looked forward to flying out from our home in Metro Manila (Philippines) to their province to be with her for the last time.  

But, first things first… I had to go to St. Luke’s Medical Center in Bonifacio Global City, for my routine 36th week checkup & ultrasound.  My OB did a Biophysical Score of our baby and told me that my fluid was low.  In my mind, I thought, “Okay, I’ll just have to drink up at home then.” But, my OB had another plan... I needed to be admitted to the High Risk Pregnancy Unit and hydrate via IV. I called Ritche and he agreed for me to be confined, thinking we’ll just stay overnight until my fluid goes up in 24 hours.  

So, aside from the IV drip, I tripled my water intake to 3 liters in the morning, 3 liters in the afternoon and 2 liters at night, which equated peeing almost every hour! AND I had to be hooked to several machines so my heart rate, blood pressure, baby’s heart rate and my contractions will be monitored for 24 hours. It was super uncomfortable but I thought, “No problem! As long as baby’s fluid will go up right away.”  We then asked our churchmates and close family & friends to pray with us.  I also prayed that I would be discharged as soon as possible so that Ritche could still travel the next day to be with Lola Auring.

24 hours later, Friday afternoon, my fluid just increased a tiny bit so my OB double checked the protein-creatinine ratio in my urine. While waiting for the results, we got a regular room and waited another 24 hours.  My husband already cancelled his trip and let my mother-in-law, Mama Tess, go ahead to their home in the province.  My UPC ratio was still extremely high, which made me a candidate for severe pre-eclampsia. We couldn’t believe it.  Even my OB couldn’t believe it, either. I’ve always been careful with my diet, preferring veggies & fruits. I always made sure I had regular exercise.  My blood pressure has always been normal.  How could I have pre-eclampsia?   

We’ve been praying for Baby Abe to come out at least on his 38th week so, imagine our surprise when she advised us on Saturday afternoon that we’ll both be safer if he came out as soon as I reach my 37th week, which was the following day, Sunday!  Questions ran through my mind.  We knew 38 weeks is the ideal.  How do I induce labor?  We’ve always just waited for me to labor naturally.  With Agatha, our 5th child, we had to keep her in as long as possible.  With Abe, it seems, we now had to bring him out as soon as possible! We hadn’t even packed our hospital bag! We were just supposed to buy baby boy stuff this week!

I had my Birth Plan printed out for the doctors and nurses and went back to the High Risk unit so that I can be given magnesium sulfate to counter possible seizure/convulsions.  I was also given 4000 mg of Evening Primrose Oil every 4 hours to soften my cervix. It just seemed so foreign and unnatural to me that we had to naturally induce labor.  How do we do that?  

My husband comforted me and reminded me that we have a great and awesome God and that so many people are praying for us.  He had been diligently communicating with and updating our close friends.  My dearest friend Kartika from Singapore visited me twice. My best friend and sister, Lala and her husband, Solomon, came all the way from Carmona, Cavite, to encourage me with their love and presence.  Our dear godparents, Fr. Dino and Sis. Anj, braved the 3-hour traffic to show their support and pray with us. When they mentioned the words “total trust” and “perfect peace” in their prayers, I was inspired by the Holy Spirit to write down the alliterations the Lord revealed to me as they were born in my heart so I can meditate on them:

“Total Trust in Thee”  “Perfect Peace in the Prince of Peace”  “Sweet Surrender to My Savior”  “Calm and Courageous in Christ”  “Blissfully Blessed and Brave to Birth our Baby Boy”  “Relaxed, Rested and Ready”

Most importantly, my mother, Mama Lou, my father-in-law, Papa Adelo, and our 5 beautiful and wonderful children, gave me so much encouragement that I knew that we can bring Baby Abe out in God’s perfect timing.  The Holy Spirit will lead me and guide our baby out.

Monday, after the magnesium sulfate treatment, I had another ultrasound.  Baby’s fluid had significantly increased from 7.89 to 13!  Praise God!  We could really feel the prayers of everyone.  We were ready to induce natural labor.  My OB mentioned that Baby Abe could even be born on Thursday, which was her birthday!  But I thought to myself that I didn’t want to labor that long.  Our churchmates, Dcn. Jojo and Sis. Evelyn, brought homebaked muffins along with much laughter and prayed over us before leaving.

We finally finished my IV (Yay!) and I drank my red raspberry leaf tea, walked about our windowless room, slow danced, bounced on a birthing ball. Contractions were very mild at 3-5 minutes apart, but they weren’t “painful.”  Mama Chato, our midwife who helped me naturally birth our other children, taught us that we must reframe contractions as “good pain” because it helps bring the baby down.  The more you welcome each “good pain” and embrace the sensation, the more relaxed you will be and fear will leave you.  So, everytime I felt a contraction coming, I relaxed my facial muscles, my jaw, my shoulders and let the tightening sensation do its work on my belly. The uterus is a very powerful muscle and I looked forward to the pressure, imagining that every contraction brought Baby Abe closer to being in my arms.

The resident doctor did my first internal examination and said I’m only 2cm dilated.  Well, at least it’s not totally closed, right?  However, at 530pm, I had an unexplainable occurrence of “chills” where I suddenly felt like I was freezing.  I couldn’t stop my teeth from chattering and my body from shaking violently. My mom wrapped me in thick blankets, wore socks on me, rubbed my legs. I called my husband to hurry, as he was getting some documents for our hospital stay. I placed my cold hands in my armpits and prayed that the nurse won’t peek in and report that I’m having some kind of seizure.  The chills passed after 20 minutes.  My husband warmed me with his embrace.  However, I couldn’t sleep a wink that night.  My husband decided we transfer again to a normal room with windows so I could be more comfortable.  I searched online “how to dilate cervix fast” and visualized my cervix opening and prayed constantly to the Lord to give me thoughts of peace and not anxiety.  The baby knows when to be born.

Tuesday, I had a prenatal massage to relax and press those labor-inducing points, drank more red raspberry leaf tea, bounced on the ball and did more than walking, I did some dancing, too!  Contractions were still mild at 3-5 minutes apart. I had another bout of “chills” at 530pm so my mother wrapped me again and I rebuked every thought of convulsion or seizure.  I kept telling myself that this will pass and Baby Abe is safe in my womb. The chills stopped at 6pm. By 8pm, I was so tired from the lack of sleep that I was able to sleep very well, even with the regular rhythm of my belly tightening.  We continued to entrust everything into the Father’s hands. 

The next day, Wednesday, February 20, I was determined to up my natural induction techniques.  My OB was pleased with the progress of my labor but reminded me not to wait until my water broke.  She reminded me to let her residents know when I’m already 4cm dilated, because I gave birth so quickly to our last child, she almost didn’t make it.  

My Mama Lou and I danced belly, hip hop, Zumba to the jiggiest songs I could find (Think “Trolls” soundtrack, “Walking on Sunshine” “Moves Like Jagger” “Waka Waka” you get the picture) and I sang my heart out to our Hillsong & Bethel favorites (Oceans, What a Beautiful Name, O Praise the Name, Open Heaven/River Wild, It Is Well, No Longer Slaves, etc.) when I rested. The doctors and nurses were amazed I could still sing and dance through my contractions.  Haha!  It actually took my mind away from the pressure.  By 530pm, I thought my water was leaking so I called a resident to examine me.  No water, just the EvePrim Oil melting but I was 3-4cm dilated.  Yay! She then asked me to go down to continue laboring in the High Risk unit.   Labor progressed very quickly and I did feel more and more pressure every minute!  

Shout out to the doctors and nurses of St. Luke’s BGC for honoring my Birth Plan as much as possible and I agreed that I will only be hooked to the monitor for 20-30 mins every 2 hours.. No pitocin, no IV, no oxygen and no pain meds.  By 8pm, I was 5cm dilated.  Hooray! That pushed me to do even more dancing, bouncing, marching, swaying & singing during contractions, with my husband playing every song I requested.  The pressure was already immense at this time, and I had a tugging feeling I was very close to transition, although it’s only been a couple of hours.  I was thankful that my husband was just right there to tell me I’m doing great, and my mother was also with us, cheering me on.  Whenever I felt the tremendous pressure, I would say, “Baby’s going down, down, down!  Yes, yes, yes! Go, go, go!” and I knew that they both agreed with me and believed with me.  

I was already speaking in tongues, asking the Holy Spirit to be my Comforter, my Teacher, my Guide.  I envisioned Mama Mary giving birth to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  I remembered all our children who are happily awaiting their baby brother at home. They’re counting on me to give birth to Baby Abe soon.  I wanted to birth this beautiful being in my womb without fear, only love and joy and peace... Feelings of indescribable bliss welled up in my heart for this boy whom Ritche and I had so conceived in love.  I was determined to confidently bring him out in that same love that conceived him. 

At 1030pm, I asked the resident to check my cervix, which had already dilated to 7cm, with a “bursting” effacement.  I had to be strapped again so I lay down waiting for the nurse when, a minute after, the nurse relays the message from the doctor to tell them right away if my water bag ruptures. She hadn’t left the room yet when my water bag burst!  It felt like a water balloon popped out of me. 

I excitedly told everyone, “Baby’s coming out!”

 They wheeled me out our room into the delivery room right away.  I felt the head of Baby Abe crowning.. I thought I couldn’t hold him in anymore.. but I tried to relax, as the doctors were still preparing, I had to be moved from my bed to the delivery bed and my husband, Ritche, was also getting into scrubs. I requested that I be more upright and not lying down.  Our OB was nowhere to be found but already gave instructions to her three resident OBs present in the room.  I already felt like pushing but was holding Baby Abe in.. I was so excited.. I called my husband.. “Daddy!” and told the nurse, “The cellphone!” Haha!  I didn’t want the nurse to miss taking Daddy Ritche’s picture catching Baby Abe.

Finally, it was only a matter of minutes before I told them I had to push Baby’s head out.  The doctors assured me and said they won’t hinder me from pushing.  His head came out and the doctor was wise enough to remind me not to push anymore because he slid out so easily! It’s a birth phenomenon they call the “Fetal Ejection Reflex.” Pushing would have made the baby fly out.. Haha! It was amazing to see my husband “catching” our son!  As with all our other children (except Therese who underwent emergency CS), he did the ceremonial cord cutting after the cord stopped pulsating.  Baby Abe had already pooped meconium but miraculously, he didn’t ingest any and his Apgar score was 9 out of 10.  Thank God!

I delivered the placenta within 5 minutes. And our OB, Dra. Bambalan, arrived moments after to check on me.  Everything looked good.  My blood pressure stayed normal all throughout. I had a 1 mm tear that didn’t need any stitching. 

They were amazed at how easy the birth was and how fresh I still looked even after giving birth.  We all laughed at how my primary concern was to get the cellphone to the nurse and how Baby Abe didn’t want to have the same birthday as Doc.  Everyone in the room was lighthearted and Dr. De Guzman exclaimed that this was one delivery she will never ever forget!

All in all, we stayed in the delivery room for 18 minutes then I was brought out to the Recovery Room for 4 hours to check on Baby Abe and me.  By the end of the recovery period, my BP was still stable, Baby Abe and I had skin to skin contact and he latched on the breast perfectly, but there was just one problem.  The nurse said that they’d have to put a catheter on me if I didn’t urinate soon. No way!  I gently pressed on my bladder and, sure enough, I was able to pee on my own.

The next 48 hours were critical for me and Baby Abe. I recently saw the diagnosis of my OB upon discharge.  It was Pre-eclampsia with Severe Features.  But, thank God, we never manifested any complications.  No headache, nausea, vomiting, seizure, swelling, convulsion, shortness of breath whatsoever.  My blood pressure never elevated all throughout.  Baby’s oxygen levels were stable.  I didn’t go into shock, stroke, had brain damage or any organ failure. I didn’t need any kind of pain medication.  

Within 48 hours of delivery, we went home to our family, carrying our 6thbundle of joy, our second boy, whom we named "Abraham Nickola."  So thankful to all our family, relatives, friends, and churchmates for keeping us in your thoughts and lifting us up in prayer.  I believe that Ritche’s grandmother, Lola Auring, was also looking down from Heaven and interceding for us, along with all the saints and angels. To God be all the glory, honor and praise!  He is a miracle-working God who faithfully keeps all His promises and grants us the desires of our hearts!

By: Chat Jandayan @chatjandayan

Most of the photos were taken by my husband and my mom.

This is why excellent childbirth education is a must, why planning for your birth and the unexpected challenges that can arise, is so important today, and is a major reason why I created my Love Your Birth course. It is a comprehensive online course that teaches women what they need to know about planning and carrying out the birth that they want in all settings - the hospital, birthing center or at home. It’s a course on how to have a holistic, healthy pregnancy for the body, mind, and soul - and is how I have guided thousands of women and their families in my midwifery practice for over 21 years.

It contains a rolodex of my favorite resources with over 200 of the best books, movies and supplies I use personally and professionally with my clients, family & friends. Even diving into a fraction of this list will have you feeling empowered and prepared for conception, pregnancy, postpartum and parenting...It includes resources on improving and even ensuring ensuring healthier pregnancy and birth outcomes than the status quo, and preventing and healing from birth trauma so prevalent in the modern world!  

Be prepared to do some research on your own, but knowledge restores your power. I also help you prepare your mindset for such a task, to debunk myths, and to reframe any current ideas or conditioning about pregnancy and birth that can use a change in perspective or that are simply incorrect and do serve you. After finishing the course, the idea is that you are now able to create and have the healthy, beautiful and empowering pregnancy and birth that you want - so you can ROCK your birth, however it unfolds!

It’s wonderful alone, a great refresher or adjunct to any other course!

Hospital Waterbirth Story

I remember waking up and smelling the coffee brewing whilst on holiday in Miami....the smell instantly made me feel sick. After a super long flight and the time difference I thought the extreme fatigue and nausea was due to jet lag, but then the aversion to my favourite drink made it very clear. It suddenly all made sense when I got an instant positive result on a pregnancy test (then another one).

The rest of the holiday was challenging, I couldn’t shake the nausea, so walking around Disney world during a heat wave and a long flight home were both extremely hard! It turns out I was actually almost 7 weeks pregnant. Thankfully the nausea only lasted 12 weeks. The rest of the pregnancy was smooth, no complaints at all. Each time I saw the midwife I felt hopeful I could have my baby on the midwife led unit, as everything was going well. By the third trimester in true Mrs Hinch style I scrubbed my house on a daily basis and loved every second of it. Pine disinfectant became my new pregnancy craving (weird I know, don’t worry I didn’t ingest it) as much as I felt the urge to! Approaching my due date, from 38 weeks I had lots of pressure and I was sure Baby Dewey number two would be early, as Ava was two days early..…well that’s what everyone says right? Wrong! 

There I was 7 days late and feeling ready to meet my baby, wondering when they would make an appearance. It was a sunny Sunday morning and I had a sweep at 9 am. The midwife said she could feel baby’s head and said that if it was going to be successful it would be in the next 48 hours. I left the hospital feeling hopeful. We went home and went about our day as normal, going for a long walk, food shopping, cleaning and then I cooked a roast dinner. I put Ava to bed then had a long soak in the bath and bounced on my ball for the rest of the evening. I lost my mucus plug over the duration of the evening and couldn’t shake the feeling baby would be coming in the early hours of the morning. So I made the phone calls to make sure childcare was in place for Ava - just in case, and got an early night.

I woke at 1.30 am on the Monday with a familiar feeling, which I thought was my first contraction. So I laid awake and waited then another came 12 minutes later, then 8 minutes. I knew this was the start of things to come so just relaxed in bed for 30 mins breathing through my contractions then woke Simon to let him know “it was happening”. The pain was in in my lower back which was the same as my labour with Ava,  so I knew how to deal with my pain in the best way which was to stand and gently rock side to side whilst breathing through each contraction and leaning on a surface.

By 3 am my contractions were every 2-3 minutes so we decided we should call my Dad and Step Mum to come to our house to look after Ava. Whilst we waited for them to arrive I got myself dressed and Simon gathered up all of our hospital bags then we waited downstairs. I continued to sway whilst leaning on the breakfast bar and Simon contacted the Midwife Led Unit who then said to come straight up. By the time my Dad arrived my contractions were every 1-2 minutes. 

We got to the hospital at 4 am and our midwife Julie did all of the routine checks in between my contractions then just calmly remained in the background for a while observing. My contractions were getting more intense but the swaying and breathing helped and Simon massaged my lower back which gave lots of relief. By 4.40 the midwife wanted to check how dilated I was.

With how long the contractions were lasting and the frequency of them, I was sure I had to be quite far along but I was only just 4 cm at a stretch. I felt slightly disheartened for a moment but the contractions were coming quick so I soon forgot about that and continued with my breathing whilst the birthing pool was being filled. The water gave me such relief and I felt really calm whilst in the water, on my knees leaning over the edge.

The lights in the room were dimmed and the radio was on playing Christmas music which was super relaxing. At 5.30 I felt a lot of pressure and then a pop then realised my waters had gone. I then felt the baby move lower into my pelvis and knew that it wouldn’t be long. By 5.45 the contractions were coming thick and fast, every minute lasting a minute infact and the pressure felt stronger. I became very aware of the noises I was making and i remember that feeling well, I knew it was getting very close. Julie asked if I wanted any pain relief so I opted for some gas and air. At that moment I felt the surges get stronger and an urge to start pushing. My body knew exactly what to do so I went with it. The gas and air made me feel a little delirious at times but it made the pain manageable, without making me feel out of control.  I felt my baby moving down with every push and this time I really remember the burning sensation and that ring of fire everyone talks about. During the crowning stage I remember thinking at times I couldn’t do it, but I redirected my thoughts, concentrated on my breathing and reminded myself I would soon be meeting my baby! After 30 minutes of pushing my baby girl was born at 6.14 am weighing 7Ib 5oz.

I remember that overwhelming feeling of love as I placed her onto my chest. By this point we didn’t know the gender so I had a look and was so excited to see it was another girl. I knew how much Ava wanted a baby sister so I knew she would be so happy! Simon cut the cord then I got out of the pool and onto the bed. Amelia was a little shocked and blue as the cord was around her neck but they gave her a quick rub and she was fine. The midwife asked if I wanted to deliver the placenta without the injection so i thought I’d try, I gave one small push and it came out nice and easy! My baby girl was then placed onto my chest for some much needed skin to skin time. Simon and I were then left to bond with our new baby girl. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect birth, I wanted to feel in control, to feel the surges and I was desperate for a water birth and I got all of those things!
Kirsty Dewey  @mumma_dewey

A healthy natural birth in today’s modern world takes preparation in advance, especially if you are planning to birth in the hospital. Check out my number one international best selling book Natural Birth Secrets and my online course - an online version of how I have helped thousands in my local practice.

Both resources are unique, but each provide an in depth, one-of-a-kind holistic approach created by me, a seasoned nurse midwife of over two decades, who has seen everything!

Choose inspiration and optimal holistic health during, birth and after pregnancy, by clicking here to take my online Love Your Birth course, so you can ROCK your journey wherever and however you plan to give birth. It is for giving birth at home, in the birthing center or hospital…whether you choose to hire a midwife or physician.

I have a holistic approach to life, including healing after pregnancy and birthing. Nothing replaces abdominal toning and exercise for restoring muscle strength and tone - which I encourage for all mamas as soon as they feel up to it postpartum.

Nothing replaces touch, slow deep abdominal breathing, and a 'love your postpartum body' perspective that I promote.  But I have found many mamas simply feel comforted by this support garment, especially early postpartum and temporarily as needed....to be used without forfeiting abdominal toning and strengthening exercise, breathing well and touch. 

I have found Bellefit supportive garments to help like they use belly binding around the world such as in Indonesia. They do aid in early postpartum healing and provide support many mamas feel comforted by. I deal with human beings and the reality is many postpartum mom's struggle with body image, feel frustrated that getting back to themselves takes longer than expected. Being into holistic health and healing includes being sensitive to real human struggles - the mind, body, heart and soul of each person and their unique situation. 

Having helped countless women with these issues after having a baby as a midwife, I have found many still love that binding and feel better with this support, and ability to fit into their pre-pregnancy clothes comfortably and sooner than they would if they went through a C-section or natural childbirth recovery without it - especially when they have to dress up and fit into a certain favorite outfit for a special occasion or wedding not long after having a baby.

For more info on the Bellefit girdle, check out my blog about it here. Have a Great Postpartum Recovery (with a little help from Bellefit)!

Preterm Birth Story and the Little Thriving Soldier Baby

My DJ was born on Thursday, December 15, 2016. I remember like it was just yesterday. It's an experience I'll never forget. My water broke at about 6:00 on Wednesday morning. I was rushed to our local hospital, then transported to Vidant Medical Center in Greenville, NC. I was only 26 weeks, so it was reason to be alarmed. I was bedridden and given procardia to prevent the pre-term labor, but none of it worked.

7:00 am Thursday morning, the labor pains commenced. I could hardly stand it as I frantically paged the nurse. The doctor was called. She checked my cervix. It was time! The delivery was quick yet traumatic. Due to my heart condition, an emergency c-section was scheduled but my baby boy couldn't wait. With oxygen on my face and a needle in my spine, I began to push while sitting upright on the edge of the delivery table. The doctor could see his tiny head crowning and immediately laid me back, asking me to give her one more big push. As I'm pushing, I go completely numb from the spinal anesthesia but I did it! DJ was born at 10:26 am. They held him up for me to see as I cried tears of joy and worry. He wasn't crying at all but his little eyes were wide open as he looked right at me. He was so small and frail but the most beautiful angel I've ever seen. My first child at the age of 40 had arrived and I felt so blessed. After cleaning him up, they allowed me one kiss before placing his tiny body into an incubator and moving him to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). My parents caught a glimpse of him in the hallway and smiled with glee to meet their newest grandchild. Meanwhile, I was sent to recovery and wouldn't see my bundle of joy again for several hours.

After signing in at the front desk of the NICU, washing our hands (of course), my then husband wheeled me to Pod B where our beloved was waiting. There he was all swaddled up with his sweet little face covered due to the ventilator needed to help him breath. He weighed only 790 grams (1 lb, 12 oz) and 13 inches long, but strong! As I watched our son fighting for his life, I cried and cried. Why did this happen?

I greatly assume it was my gestational diabetes or the stress I was under due to a trying later failed marriage. However, I read that there are risk factors for being born early, such as infection, placental problems or genetic problems, but in many cases the cause is unknown. An estimated 15 million babies are born too early every year, That is more than 1 in 10 babies. Wow! I couldn't imagine the arduous journey ahead for my peanut. All the tests, diagnoses, procedures, bradycardias and near fatal incidences that caused such an emotional rollercoaster. Without God, he wouldn't have made it through, and I wouldn't have made it through my postpartum period that was thankfully short-lived. DJ spent four months and one week at James and Connie Maynard Children's Hospital, and I never left his side. I was there every single day for him, enduring the worse and the better times. Thank God for the tremendous support of so many in our corner, including the awesome hospital staff and The Ronald McDonald House of Eastern NC. 

After leaving the hospital, I became a stay-at-home mom taking care of DJ full-time because he was considered disabled and unable to enroll into daycare. I'm so blessed to be here for every waking moment, watching my son continuing to thrive despite his near fatal illnesses and hospitalizations.  I was also blessed with the time to be able to self-publish my first children's book entitled, "The Mighty 1", dedicated to my baby. DJ is now two years strong, weighing 24.5 lbs and 32 inches long. My little soldier is so amazing and I'm beyond blessed to be his mommy. 

---

The Mighty 1 is a poetic tale about a brave soul who is tiny but mighty, just like the miracle baby in your life. Every year, millions of babies are born prematurely and many will spend several weeks or months in the neonatal intensive care unit. It's such an emotional journey for families whose lives have changed in an instant. This book was created to bring inspiration and smiles to all of you. It makes a great read for NICU cuddle time, and the perfect keepsake too! Preview and order your copy of "The Mighty 1" now.

By Ebony Moore @ebonydmoore

Was your birth upsetting or traumatic? Do you have more questions about processing your birth and need help healing? Arrange some time to chat with me. I’d love to answer your questions and help you heal and get yourself back - I have a program specifically for you, that can also include this revolutionary and profound natural healing modality called Clarity Breathwork. Helping people heal from birth trauma and other traumatic experiences, emotional pain and inner stress is one of my passions and areas of expertise. I also devoted several sections of my Natural Birth Secrets book on birth trauma in both moms and babies, and also wrote a book called the Trauma Release Formula…both are available on Amazon.

Birth Story of Redemption

“Redemption: Koen James

Stalking your Instagram and drooling over all things Birth!

I wanted to share my story:

After experiencing a hospital birth and an at home intervention free birth I have such a deeper connection with my body and the things it is capable of. I find myself being in complete awe over what the woman’s body can accomplish by watching, scrolling, and reading stories into the wee hours into the early morning. An indescribable feeling.

Those who attended the birth of my first born would tell you it was unforgettable in the worst of ways. Two years ago, I was riding passenger on the way to the hospital to be induced. My husband and I discussed during our drive how delighted we were for our lives to change to a family of three to avoid the anxiety we felt. After a short ride we arrived to small talk and routine work: readying IV's, retrieving a catheter, sterilizing the area, the whole nine. Luckily I was contracting on my own the use of pitocin was unnecessary and went directly to breaking my water. Before leaving my room my doctor quickly questioned me about the need of an epidural. Although my pain was fear driven, I was young and naive, I insisted.

Seconds after receiving the epidural I was reaping it's effects. I became so nauseated I couldn't bare to speak. I was begging for relief as they injected a dose of phenergan into my IV. Little did anyone know I was severely allergic to the medicine. I couldn't see. I couldn't talk. I began to black out. I woke up for a split second patting my chest in hopes to convey something was wrong. My nurse was frustrated unaware of the situation she got two inches from my face yelling "USE YOUR WORDS" repeatedly. All I could do was grab her arm with a frail grip before passing out again. My condition was worsening when I awoke for a second time. I remember looking up to my husband holding my hand, telling me it would be okay, as he began to tear. Everyone was being rushed out of the room as a team of doctors scrambled through the door. I didn't know it but my heart rate was dropping.

 Awake for a third and final time, it was over but now it was time to push. I was exhausted and still confused, I thought the oxygen they had me on was their attempt to put me to sleep. In between surges, with what little energy I had left, I was fighting to remove the mask. Two hours of nodding in and out, I remember asking if it was almost over. Anything that could have gone wrong, did. I was ready to be holding our baby boy. A tiny six pounds and twelve ounces, he was finally here. Relieved we're both okay, I still look back and break a little inside unable to recall the birth of my first child. 

Once we became pregnant for the second time we knew, wherever we delivered, we would not opt for any interventions. It wasn't until the third trimester we started weighing out our options of where we would welcome our newest addition. I knew I didn't want to be in the same environment I was with my first, scarred from the experience we lived previously. It wasn't until then we discussed a home birth. No pokes and pricks, being in the comfort of home, I wouldn't have to find a sitter for our son, it appeared to be a dream. This is what I wanted. 

It was a day after my due date when my water broke as I was laying our son down for a nap. I immediately alerted my midwife, Rebekah, who was attending a birth of another mother. I then called out to my husband and informed him we would have a baby soon. We went about the rest of our day normally, trying to do the odds and ends in order to prep our house for birth. I continuously encouraged my husband to get as much rest as possible before going to bed myself.  

I was filled with mixed emotions as I attempted to close my eyes. Although this was my second birth it was very much my first. I didn't know what to expect as I had no previous experience other than reading what I could online. I woke up early Sunday morning with consistent contractions. I began timing them before I carefully crept out of bed trying not disrupt our son to go wake my husband on the couch. I could tell he had gotten little to no sleep. As I started to explain I needed his help timing my contractions he told me he didn't go to bed until five that morning.. it was three. Nodding in and out we averaged my contractions two minutes apart while lasting thirty five seconds. 

Keeping my midwife updated she decided it was time to head my way. They arrived just as the sun was making an appearance through the trees. She had brought along some back up, Paige a student midwife, as the rest of her team was still with laboring mother before me. As we got aquatinted my contractions stayed two minutes apart while lengthing in time. I was checked at five centimeters when Rebekah asked if I felt comfortable with her leaving to attend her previous engagement. I gave her the thumbs up as I tried to get comfortable for the labor ahead. 

I was stretched across the couch when Paige encouraged me to get into a more baby friendly position to help descend him further into the birth canal. I put a pillow under each knee and squatted down while leaning over the seat cushions. I could feel my contractions intensifying as I was overcome by intolerable back pain. My husband would try massage me while Paige squeezed my hips, but it was doing more harm than good. I couldn't be touched. All I wanted to do was lay down. 

I crawled back up on the couch surrounding myself with pillows in every direction to give my body some ease. With each wave I would reach out to my husband and pull on his shirt until it passed. I had been laboring in the living room for a short couple of hours, since my midwives arrived, when I decided I wanted to try a new method of comfort and relax in a hot bath. Before stepping into the water, Paige checked me in between six and seven centimeters. She called Rebekah to inform her of my progression. Minutes away from reaching her destination she asked if she needed to turn around. Since my dilation appeared slow Rebekah continued on her drive.

My son was still asleep in the room next to me when I got into the bath. I immediately turned on the cold water. I was refreshed with the cooling sensation through the marathon my body was running. At this time my contractions were now a minute or more long. The pain I felt in my back had me paralyzed. I could do nothing but scream. I managed to wake our son from the howls I released through each surge. As much as I wanted him there I knew I couldn't comfort him like he wanted me to, so we quickly called for reinforcements. My husband attended to his side while Paige poured water over my forty week belly and reminded me that I could do this. I wasn't in the tub for ten minutes when I told her I needed to push. No one was expecting me progress the way I had. She asked me slightly confused "You need to push or feel like you want to push?" I shouted "HES HERE". 

Before getting up to notify Rebekah, she wanted me to promise I wouldn't push. I knew it was no promise I could keep. Our son's ride arrived relieving my husband back to his former duty of being by my side. I had one more contraction in the tub when I demanded we make a run for it. I was caught in the hallway by another surge before reaching the couch. Rebekah was too far away. She would never make it back in time. It was just the three of us. With Rebekah absent, my husband and Paige rushed to get everything ready for the arrival of our newest baby boy.

I was already pushing as I watched them grab the rest of the necessities. I beared down against Paige who was positioned at my feet. Through all the pain I had felt that morning I was at such peace while pushing. With two more thrusts he was here. I lifted him up to my chest and rubbed my fingers across his face. He had the most perfectly round head and that beautiful burgundy after birth color. My husband cut the cord while I took everything in that I had missed the first time. I finally got the birth I had been longing for. I thanked my body for overcoming my mind and showing me what I was truly capable of.

I questioned myself on if I should write my story when I was reminded, I gave birth at home, after a traumatizing first experience, without any interventions, and that itself is a success. I could and I did and this time I remembered. 

@shelbylclowers’’ 

Was your birth upsetting or traumatic? Do you have more questions about processing your birth and need help healing? Arrange some time to chat with me. I’d love to answer your questions and help you heal and get yourself back - I have a program specifically got you, that can also include this revolutionary and last natural healing modality called Clarity Breathwork.  Helping women heal from birth trauma is one of my passions and areas of expertise. So is preventing it in the first place.

This is why excellent childbirth education is a must, why planning for your birth is so important today, and is a major reason why I created my Love Your Birth course. It is a comprehensive online course that teaches women what they need to know about planning and carrying out the birth that they want in all settings - the hospital, birthing center or at home. It’s a course on how to have a holistic, healthy pregnancy for the body, mind, and soul - and is how I have guided thousands of women and their families in my midwifery practice for over 21 years. It contains a rolodex of my favorite resources with over 200 of the best books, movies and supplies I use personally and professionally with my clients, family & friends. Even diving into a fraction of this list will have you feeling empowered and prepared for conception, pregnancy, postpartum and parenting...It includes resources on improving and even ensuring ensuring healthier pregnancy and birth outcomes than the status quo, and preventing and healing from birth trauma so prevalent in the modern world!  Be prepared to do some research on your own, but knowledge restores your power. I also help you prepare your mindset for such a task, to debunk myths, and to reframe any current ideas or conditioning about pregnancy and birth that can use a change in perspective or that are simply incorrect and do serve you. After finishing the course, the idea is that you are now able to create and have the healthy, beautiful and empowering pregnancy and birth that you want - so you can ROCK your birth! It is a course that is recommended by doctors, midwives, and other professionals around the globe!

You can get a free nugget from my course - all about creating your ideal birth plan here. A huge part of preventing birth trauma is getting clear your birth preferences, knowing the pros and cons about all the tests and procedures, all the interventions your may be faced with, so you can make informed decisions - rather than simply give over your body, your choice and voice to your health care providers and institution you choose.