It Takes A Village Birth Story - A Doula That Made A Difference

The Birth, and Baby Moon of Felix.

5th June 2017; 12.15am.

It was a mild Sunday. I had done 283 days of pregnancy...approximately 6792 hours (if the days didn’t sound long enough). I was 3 days overdue, the size and weight of a led balloon and I had absolutely reached my breaking point. For the past 2 weeks I’d had seemingly constant Braxton Hicks, awful back pain and every night ended in a false labour. I spent the day lying in bed crying, and coming to terms with the fact that I was obviously going to be an elephant forever.

I had previously had two very rapid births, with my last being very traumatic, riddled with pre, and post-natal depression. I was young, desperate for a home birth and felt completely ignored and not listened to by the NHS. I ended up in the midwife led unit at my nearest hospital being held down on my back to birth, which was not good considering I had SPD. I thought I had dealt with the anxiety this experience had caused me; but until I fell pregnant again this time round, I had no idea how much I had locked away. I had a fantastic midwife for this pregnancy, who arranged a debrief with a lovely lady that gave me the confidence to be sure my wish for a home birth would be met. I had done endless sessions of hypnotherapy at home, printed off affirmation cards to stick to my wall, made a visual birth plan, practised my breathing techniques, watched calm home birth videos, had a pregnancy blessing with all of my most cherished female friends; and hired a fabulous doula to make sure that I had the best possible chance of achieving what I needed for myself and my baby. I spent the last few months being proud of my body, really coming to terms with my changing shape and loving it! However, those last two weeks of pregnancy really started to drain on all of this preparation and, to be honest, I was at the point of taking any offer made that would get this baby out of me.

My doula came over Sunday afternoon to give this giant pregnant elephant a pep talk to help get me out of the headspace I had ended up in. She said to spend the afternoon ‘pretending I wasn’t pregnant’; so we made plans to go the cinema the following day, and all sat down as a family to watch the One Love Manchester concert before bed. At around 7.45 the kids were settling when I suddenly felt a pop and my waters started gushing everywhere.

We phoned our doula to come back over, my mum and our birthing partners. Everyone arrived super quickly whilst I phoned the labour line to alert them that things were kicking off. They assured me that they’d send a midwife out as soon as my surges got to one in 6; they had one ready who knew the area really well so to phone back as soon as things became regular

After this, my doula did a sideline release; a technique from spinning babies, to get Felix in to a better position. By this point waters were literally covering my living room floor and sofa every time I moved; my once massive bump had deflated and completely changed shape, making us all think baby was going to be of average size. After some bouncing on my birthing ball and finding a chilled out music playlist; I went to the loo, which caused things to massively ramp up to the point I couldn’t get back upstairs without starting to make birthing noises.

Daniel, my 3 year old; helped his dad massage my back whilst my doula helped keep my breathing steady and my mum phoned the midwife back. I was asked to go into the birthing unit, but in the throes of labour, I “politely” declined. By 11.30, things had massively ramped up, and it was obvious that Felix was well on his way. I made my way to the air bed we had prepared, whilst my doula held my pelvis and a paramedic was phoned.

I could feel Felix moving up and down the birth canal with every surge. The intensity was beyond my ability to describe! Hannah, my 5 year old was awoken by the commotion and came in to watch on in fascination. We had prepared both the children beforehand with lots of conversations about what would happen, along with lots of home birth videos on YouTube; so they knew what was going to happen. In just 2 minutes, at 12.15am; Felix was born!

The paramedic walked in as his head was born. She was wonderful and completely respected my choice to be observed from a distance. Not long after Felix landed on the airbed; the midwives walked in. I birthed on all fours so leant back to pick up my beautiful, and huge, baby boy. I was the first to touch him, which was magical! We had some skin to skin; then he latched on and fed until the placenta was delivered naturally at 12.45am. The cord wasn’t touched until this point, by which time Felix had got the full amount of goodness from it, and it had turned white. His dad then helped to cut it, with the kids watching on, still in complete fascination. My doula helped me tie his rainbow cord tie on, and then he was weighed. 10lbs5. TEN POUNDS FIVE OUNCES! The entire room erupted in a mixture of shock and humour at the fact that me, only 5’4 in height, had naturally delivered this giant child without even a taste of a paracetamol, in 2 minutes with not even a graze.

Whilst Felix was dressed and his siblings got their first cuddles, my placenta was checked over and taken by my doula for some prints and a placenta smoothie. The smoothie was blended with red berries and apple juice; it was so refreshing to drink after going through birth and completely stopped my shakes and helped to reset me. My placenta prints were done as with my last two, I never even got asked if I wanted to see the placenta. The tissue that had helped to nurture and grow my babies was whisked away like it was something dirty; so this time, I wanted a reminder of what my amazing body had held and grown that I could put some artistic flair on.

Once everything had settled, and Felix had been checked over. Everyone headed home and we settled down for bed, at 5am Monday morning. The whole experience was so surreal I couldn’t sleep from the high and excitement. I had finally got the birth I had been dreaming of. Everything about it was beautiful and wonderful.

In the first postnatal days, I was left alone to bond, feed and heal; which was completely what I needed. My birth partners were my lifeline of support, and came over to help cook, clean and provide me with copious amounts of tea and pain relief. These wonderful women had held me up throughout pregnancy and were still holding me post birth.

In these days, I had the time to do a lot of reflection on myself, and past experiences not only involving birth, but of life in general. I realized that I’ve spent way too much time trying to be perfect at everything, and too much time being afraid to ask for help; two valuable life lessons that will forever stay with me.

I also finally understood, and connected with all of those women I had read about in blogs who wanted to tell anyone and everyone about their amazing birth story; and I had a new respect for the amazing work that doulas do. Without my doula, my pregnancy and birth would probably have been completely different. On that Sunday, I needed her and she came without hesitation. Without that seemingly small pep talk, my mental state going in to birth would probably have been completely different, and I wouldn’t handled the situation as well as I did. She enabled everyone to have their own space, and made the entire atmosphere calm and confident. I could not thank her enough.

On day 7, she came out again to do a wonderful closing the bones ceremony with me. This involved a gentle abdominal massage with some beautiful oils; and some spinning babies sifting with a rebozo scarf. This helped to realign all of my muscles and really helped me to say goodbye to the last 9 very long months. After she left, I had the most beautiful milk bath with Felix; made with oat milk, lavender and chamomile oils, Epsom salts, dried rose and lavender petals and chrysanthemums. It was extremely healing; and such a different, more peaceful experience to the first baths of my last two children.

I’d like to finish this by saying to anyone who reads this; that your birth is possible, you are enough, trust yourself, and never underestimate the power that a tribe of women can bring. I started this journey a complete sceptic of mindfulness, and the power of positive thinking. I had trust issues with almost everyone, low self esteem and stopped myself from dealing with any of it by trying to be perfect at everything, and keeping myself busy. This whole experience has been more healing than I can define, and I wish that everyone could have the chance to have the experience that I have. I hope that if just one person reads this and it helps them, then I have enabled someone; like my tribe enabled me.

By Lucy Howel @hippychick_mumma.

 Birth photos by birthing partner Leanne Shepherd @shepherd_leanne. 

Postpartum Depression: Ending The Stigma

Postpartum Depression: Ending the Stigma

Guest Contributor: Haley Rolff

"The exact rate of postpartum depression is unknown because there are so many undiagnosed cases.  In the US, it’s estimated that up to 80% of women who give birth will experience some form of it, whether it’s the “baby blues” or a more severe type of postpartum depression (American Pregnancy Association). There are 4 million live births a year which means that 3.2 million women are at risk! This is before taking into account the women who have experienced stillbirths (about 24,000 happen each year in the US) and miscarriages (which happens between 660,000 and 880,000 times a year in the US) (CDC, Mayo Clinic).

As for clinical postpartum depression, specifically, about 900,000 cases are diagnosed each year (Postpartum Progress). Medical experts estimate that, when taking undiagnosed cases into account, that number could be twice as large!

Why are there so many undiagnosed cases? After conducting research and going through over 250 interviews (with moms, dads, and postpartum specialists) a team of students at Northwestern University speculate that the culture around postpartum lifestyle in the US may be a major factor.

When asked whose health came first (between the mom’s health or the baby’s health) the universal response of parents was the baby’s health. Moms think that the baby’s health comes first so much so that many of them don’t eat enough, rest enough, or practice enough self-care. Instead, they overexert themselves trying to obtain the “perfect motherhood” which many characterize with impossibly high standards in terms of the state of a mom’s baby, home, and over-all image.

Let’s start with the standards around the baby. It begins with the baby shower, where the mom receives stylish onesies, blankets, and tiny socks for her baby, who, not only is too young to enjoy its ‘gifts,’ but will quickly outgrow most of it. Those things then turn into more clutter for a mom to worry about.

Beyond the culture around the baby’s style, moms are most worried about their baby’s health. They also feel pressure to spend as much time as possible holding and interacting with her infant for the good of its development (an overwhelming message that is constantly pitched on parent blogs and other social media). Moms then feel incredibly guilty if her baby cries excessively, have issues feeding, or get sick because they see it as a sign of failure as a mom. In reality, these problems are normal and actually shared by most parents.

On Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram, however, no one posts about these problems which make them seem uncommon and a sign of bad parenting. Parents on Facebook mostly post about the positives. Why would you want to update your friends, family, and coworkers about the fact that your infant isn’t taking to breastfeeding, or is causing you to suffer from sleep deprivation? It’s easier to post cute pictures of infants’ moments of joy and pretend that life is always blissful. Moms on Pinterest post about incredible DIY baby projects, intricate baby fashion, and picture perfect homes. They don’t post about the house getting messy when parenting gets super demanding, or the sweatpants they throw on when they don’t have time to choose a stylish new mom outfit (which is much more common). Instagram is where celebrity moms and fitness-bloggers-turned-moms post their rapid postpartum recovery: somehow they get a six pack a month after giving birth, and their makeup is always perfect. In reality, the postpartum recovery process takes a while and each body has different needs and fitness restrictions.

All of this culminates into unrealistic standards for motherhood. According to the interviews, many moms who looked back on past pregnancies admitted to buying into some of these standards and regretted the toll it took on their own well-being (some interviewees revealed that they had undiagnosed postpartum mental illnesses).

Not only do these standards play a role in damaging the well-being of many moms, but it also plays a role in creating a stigma around postpartum mental illnesses, by constantly plugging that motherhood is an overall joyful experience. Although some people (even celebrities like Chrissy Teigen) are starting to talk about their experiences with postpartum depression, it is still vastly overshadowed and stigmatized by much of the media, or simply downplayed to “baby blues” which invalidates those who actually have clinical postpartum depression.

If you or a mom you know may be suffering from a form of postpartum depression, seek help from a doctor, (midwife), or a support group. Talking to people and sharing experiences is the only way to end the stigma, because it normalizes what has been wrongfully projected as obscure and shameful: mental illness. More importantly, it provides moms the support they need. Every mother deserves to be healthy, and every baby deserves a healthy mother.

Bundles of Health, a startup born out of Northwestern University, aims to give new moms better care postpartum. The company offers a curated selection of the most useful gifts to include in a baby registry. Instead of onesies, blankets, and socks, Bundles of Health allows family and friends to gift the mom-to-be a month of housecleaning, food delivery, or a postpartum doula. To add to your Amazon, Babylist, MyRegistry, or Target registry, click here. Help your loved ones give you the gift of health and happiness, time and peace of mind!

Check out Mayo Clinic’s description of postpartum depression signs, symptoms, and advice here: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/postpartum-depression/basics/symptoms/con-20029130 "

For Postpartum Mommas Worldwide

Whether it's banishing postpartum depression, healing birth trauma, or balancing me time, I'm an expert in postpartum care and can help you, no matter where you live. I've went through it all personally and professionally. I know postpartum blues, depression and anxiety well, and have helped thousands of women through what I call the "Forgotten 4th Trimester," to prevent or overcome postpartum depression and anxiety in a wholesome, effective and lasting way.  When you are struggling with feeling overwhelmed, exhaustion, mild to moderate feelings of depression or anxiety, newborn care or breastfeeding challenges, or finding a sustainable new momma rhythm, I can help you with personalized guidance for your unique situation.

Chic and Practical Clothing for The Working Pregnant and Breastfeeding Mama

Mothers. We all have them. And most of them have sacrificed the entire rest of their lives to make sure that we are well fed, have clothes on our backs, and are pointed towards a bright future. However, that doesn't necessarily mean that this is the end of their careers and dreams. One may wonder just exactly how it is possible to balance the heavy needs of raising a newborn infant and thrive in the workplace. Well, Yoko Shimada, mother of 2 beautiful children and mother of maternity and nursing fashion line Mitera has just the answers.

Having been immersed in the world of public health in a plethora of countries for the greater part of her career life, the fashion industry was and is the last place that one would expect Yoko to enter and thrive in, including Yoko herself. Yoko, with 15 plus years of experience in helping start and implement global health programs across the world, not only realized the lack of suitable clothing options to raise a baby while holding down and thriving at work, but also took the initiative to create one.

After having her second child in 2013, Yoko started to bring the idea of Mitera to life. It all began when she actually had a dress made to accommodate her breastfeeding practices while at work. With the need to pump for her daughter at her office with a notable absence of a proper facility to do so, Yoko knew that it was time for a change.

With society constantly placing unspoken pressures and expectations on mothers to breastfeed in order to raise their babies in the healthiest manner, the first months and even year, postpartum proves to be a difficult stage. Creating Mitera was a way for Yoko to take a stand against these unpractical circumstances that new mothers are faced with in their personal and professional lives.

The dresses and apparel designed by Mitera are created with these struggles in mind. For example, these chic, stylish, and practical articles of clothing provide easy yet discreet access for feeding or pumping. With both the concerns of the mother and baby in mind, Mitera's goal is not only to help smooth women’s transition into motherhood but also to honor the process of creating and bringing life into this world and celebrate the woman, the nurturer - the unique, beautiful, determined, multifaceted woman who gives all she has, while still remaining who she is.

While undergoing the journey of starting and growing her fashion company, Yoko has remained focused on lifting the women up as they embark on this major transition into motherhood and helping, in her own little way, to shatter the notion that pregnancy and becoming a mother is akin to taking a career break, a set-back, a penalty, or a weakness. There are many successful women out there, who, when they become moms, have a bit of an identity crisis because it seems like they can’t continue their own paths, like they have to give themselves up for the baby.

It was no different for Yoko. Through Mitera, she wants to help give these women - working moms and stay-at-home moms alike their strength and self-confidence back, to feel even more connected to their bodies and self and to be empowered with this new gift of motherhood. Mitera celebrates and supports women all around the world throughout their motherhood journeys and as they become better versions of themselves through the incredible experience of motherhood.  

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3 Ways to Improve Your Chances of a Healthy Childbirth

Are you looking to have a healthy, deeply positive birth that stems from having a healthy pregnancy?

Here are three ways of improving your chances of a healthy childbirth.

With any pregnancy, your hope and deepest desire as a mother is to birth a healthy and beautiful baby, whether you are birthing in the hospital, a freestanding birthing center, or at home.

With our increasingly health conscious society, home birthing is more and more becoming a viable option for many mothers.

Some of the keys to a healthy and wholesome natural birth that you LOVE no matter how it unfolds, are to be well prepared and to ensure that your choices are respected so that you’d be treated with unique focus and care.

My online Love Your Birth course will not only help you prepare for having optimal health in pregnancy and beyond, but will also help you to hone in on your own inner calm, joy and strength, as well as empower you with ways to speak your voice, and ideally avoid unnecessary interventions, medications or surgery.

You have the most active role to play in birthing your baby, and there are definitely a few things that you can do to encourage a healthy pregnancy and birth. Pay close attention to yourself and your needs on ALL levels; make a commitment to take the best care of your total health and well-being, and to nourish your body, mind, and spirit. You only have one of each!

1. A Healthy Physical Well-Being

Whether you’re pregnant or not, there are almost an infinite number of benefits that come with eating fresh, nutritious, and colorful foods and with exercising regularly. I provide some practical guidelines to help every mother with eating healthfully.

Getting the right amount of fruits, vegetables, proteins, and healthy fats each and every single day can be confusing, overwhelming, and difficult at times. Therefore, I recommend adding supplements to your healthy eating so that you and your baby get the amount of nutrients you both need during this special time.

Exercising throughout all of the trimesters as well as beyond pregnancy creates numerous benefits for YOU and your unborn BABY. Healthy pregnant women are capable, fit rockstars, and exercise will help you to feed that spirit of strength and vibrancy.

If you engage in regular exercise that you enjoy, you will have a more comfortable pregnancy and be less prone to injury. You’ll be more capable of assuming positions that allow for easier active birthing, and so more likely to have a shorter, easier labor. You’ll also have a quicker recovery, and your body will bounce back faster postpartum.

You may notice more relief from various discomforts like constipation, bloating, swelling, and backaches. You will feel more relaxed, and notice an overall sense of well-being and energy, even when fatigued.

Being active helps maintain healthy weight gain in pregnancy, stabilize blood sugar levels, and prevent complications like obesity and gestational diabetes.

If you’ve exercised consistently throughout your pregnancy, your baby is more likely to have higher Apgar scores, will transition better outside the womb, and will even have better cognitive skills in early childhood. Studies have also shown that your baby will be leaner at birth (making him or her easier to push out), and will be less prone to childhood obesity.

If you are already a healthy, active woman, I encourage you to continue doing the type of exercise you love now that you are pregnant. There are, of course, some exceptions like extreme and contact sports.

Make it fun! Get 30-45 minutes of moderate, varied exercise most days of the week whilst remaining in tune to your body’s needs. This can include muscle toning and strengthening workouts as well as stretching, aerobics, and dance.

Some types of yoga satisfy all of the above requirements and is a particularly useful form of exercise because it marries movement and breath. It’s a wonderful way to feel more calm, focused, and grounded which are essential tools for labor and mamahood.

If you have never exercised before, you can start by taking brisk walks, joining a prenatal yoga, fitness or dance class, or learning how to swim laps.

Vary it up and listen to your body, modify your exercise as needed, and maintain a healthy, varied whole food diet with good hydration.

2. Reduce Your Stress

Life has always been stressful, and inner stress is definitely not the feeling you want shadowing your pregnancy, your baby’s birth, or your mama-hood.

Take some quiet time with yourself (and baby) to determine what kind of perspective you’re operating from as well as what kind of state of mind you want to impart on your child from as early on as the womb.

Spending energy on the things you can’t change - which is literally most of life - leads to pointless angst and worry.

Adopt an attitude of surrender and acceptance for the things over which you have no power. (It is not easy to embrace this reframed way of thinking, but well worth your efforts! And, this should not discourage action if it can and does need to be taken.)

Instead, focus on what you can change: yourself. You can change and control your attitude, perspective, reactions, choices, and behaviors. This involves a deep and personal look at the thoughts and emotions you host. This takes work. However, it leads to growth that is beyond rewarding and transformative.

Cultivate a spiritual awareness and connection to the magnificent soul within you as it relates to the infinite. Believe that everything happens for your ultimate benefit and growth, even if you don't understand why.

Listen to your heart and gut and live from a place in which what you think, feel, say, and do are in harmony.

Get adequate rest by going to bed at a similar time each night, ideally before 11:00 pm, and aim for 7-8 hours of sleep or more.

Take breaks throughout the day and at least one half an hour power nap in the afternoon. You can also assume a restorative yoga pose like savasana by closing your eyes and quietly focusing only on your breathing. This kind of technique can be equivalent to 2 hours of sleep for your body.

Learn about breath awareness, relaxation techniques, and meditation to activate your own relaxation response.

Beware of over-scheduling yourself. Don’t be afraid to ask family and friends for assistance, and consider hiring help. Cut down on the non-essential burdens in your life, especially if you feel overwhelmed.

This is all easier said than done, so let your days be filled with what’s most important to you and let go of the things that really don’t matter. LIVE your life; don’t rush through it.

Monotask rather than multitask! Try to focus on doing one thing at a time with your full attention, and make a conscious decision to do fewer tasks each day. Unplug daily by limiting your phone and internet use as well as your screen time.  This will not only help you feel better but also allow you to accomplish more, by doing less.

Schedule downtime and guard it fiercely. Do whatever you want as long as it's restful and restorative and has nothing to do with work, chores, being online or running errands.

Spend quiet time each day to connect to your baby. Talk to your baby. Sing to your baby. Play beautiful music to your baby. Your baby relaxes when you do, and your baby hears and loves these precious moments.

3. A Healthy, Supportive Environment

This may be last on the list but please don’t take for granted the value that a fiercely loving support system and environment brings to your pregnancy and childbirth. Uncomfortable, stressful, or even inauthentic surroundings, for example, can surreptitiously raise the discomfort and tension in your body and mindset.

A destructive and harmful environment can be just as toxic to your system as any processed or chemically-altered food. Being mindful of your environment can help support your steps for enhancing your well-being.

In finding the right support system, you’ll be adding tremendous value to your experience like finding other like-minded women and partnering with a midwife or doctor that you trust, admire, and whose primary concern is you and your baby.

Women have supported women in community living since the beginning of time. It takes a village to raise a child as well as a new parent.

Today, even more importantly, I encourage mamas to create a fortress of positivity around themselves. Hang out with calming, positive, uplifting, empowering, and inspiring people as much as possible. If you do not know any, you can create your own tribe of like-minded mamas - they are out there.

Seek out other women who have a similar outlook regarding holistic health and wellness in pregnancy, labor, birth, breastfeeding, and parenting. Make friends at prenatal yoga class, childbirth class, pregnancy and postpartum support groups, attachment parenting, babywearing groups, and La Leche League meetings.

If you do not have these resources in your area, create your own. Host a Positive Birth Movement circle, movie screening, or a book reading. Organize a community Blessingway/mother-blessing, a Red Tent event, or a pregnancy day retreat. Create a gathering of pregnant mamas and invite a prenatal henna artist or massage therapist. Do belly casting/art with each other - you name it! Connect with others on social media - the childbearing and yoga communities are so wonderfully supportive.

Each one of these tips stands on its own with tremendous value. However, when you combine your healthy eating and exercise habits with your low-stress lifestyle and supportive community, there’s no question you’ll love your healthier pregnancy and life even more.

Eating well and exercising regularly will not only keep you and your baby healthy but your baby will also be in tune and benefit immensely from the great amount of energy and positivity that you feel. 

Every expectant mother has a right to glowing peace and a radiant tranquility.

If you haven’t already, download my free Healthy Pregnancy eBook. In it, I go into detail about everything here, including supplements and breathing techniques. You’ll find plenty more tips based on holistic and science-based practices.

And, don’t be shy to join our community! Having others to relate to and lean on is crucial in those times when you feel overwhelmed as well as during those moments when you feel impossibly joyful.

Want to connect with like-minded women supporting each other through their natural birthing journey? Join our Facebook community which is open to all active and previous clients, those who have had consultations, and who have taken my online course or other classes

Journey From Hospital To Home, Victim to Empowered, Fear To Confidence & Loving Birth

Newborn exam on parent's bed, so they can be close to baby, watch and learn.

The truth is that there are things one can do to prepare both physically and emotionally. And there are things one can do to ensure the best possible outcome for mother and baby. Pregnant women are not passive victims to their bodies. I learned these things from women like Pauline Nardella, Childbirth Educator, Anne Margolis, Certified Nurse Midwife and the filmmakers Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein who made “The Business of Being Born”.

For every woman there are specifics that stand out in their prenatal care. I did not have to be subjected to constant pelvic exams, since most of the time, there was no medical need for it. When my midwife had to determine if the baby was head down she respectfully offered me options; an exam or sonogram. Until that point, I had always been told to undress from the waist down. Never asked. Never aware I had choices. I also learned that women are suggestive when pregnant. This is not because we are suffering from “pregnancy brain” or any other one of those derogatory descriptions of a woman expecting. We are suggestive in this condition by nature because it assists in the birthing process. A pregnant woman can be told she can bond with her unborn baby and therefore she can. A pregnant woman can be told that the contractions are surges, or simply a tight feeling and therefore they are endurable or even pain free. 

Being suggestive is critical to the birthing process and being exposed to fear in a suggestive state puts women on a dangerous path toward labor. This is why numbing drugs are so critical in an optionless system, not just to medicate the pain, but to numb a women’s fear and even the fear of fear. My homebirth midwife asked me questions about my pregnancy. She asked questions about my life situation and my concerns. She let me speak and she listened. I was an active participant in the prenatal check-ups to determine the well-being of my baby. She did not overwhelm me, and with each visit she provided simple handouts of things to do or assist me in my pregnancy. I did not feel pressure to do everything (like walk a mile a day, drink a gallon of raspberry leaf tea and do 1000 kegel muscle exercises while sitting in traffic) but to do what I could and even without doing anything at all, my body knows what to do. Women do not “fail” to give birth. This truth was reaffirmed in my Hypnobirthing class. My body and my baby know what to do. We follow nature. Despite this, the moment my water broke, I felt fear. “I am not ready”, I thought. At nearly 42 weeks I should have felt ready. But I still could not let my thoughts go. Did I practice enough with the tapes? Do I have the stamina? Am I going to fail to progress like I did in the hospital with my daughter? Can I take the pain without meds? 

The first contraction was powerful. It took me by surprise. This is where my prenatal care began to demonstrate its effect on me. Instead of thinking “OW!” I thought “WOW! My body is strong.” Holding on to that thought, I went from contractions every 10 minutes to every 5 in less than an hour. Apparently positive thinking and relaxation does have an effect on the cervix. The “proof” was now in action. I actually did not plan in advance the positive affirmations I would use, but once in labor, I no longer referred to them as contractions but as waves because they were not isolated to my uterus. I felt them from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. I called my midwife to let her know the contractions were coming strong and quickly.

My husband ran around preparing the bath and trying to figure out why the heat wasn’t working that cold February night. My 2-year-old woke up looking for me. “The baby is coming?” If someone told me she was going to wake up and pine for me before our babysitter arrived, mid-transition it would have scared me. I cuddled with her and tried to put her back to bed as my husband stopped between errands to hold my hand. My midwife had the wisdom that I should prepare and inform my daughter with videos and a homebirth children’s book. She was a little afraid but more excited mostly because I was not afraid. I did not know I had the strength to care for my daughter and my labor at the same time. At my first birth my husband could not be out of my reach for two seconds. I needed his strength to get through the 20 hours of pain.

Without any rubs this time, I made it one wave at a time. I realized that the waves only lasted for about one minute or so and at this point the endorphins kicked in and the calm between lasted for three or more. It felt utterly divine so I focused on this. Since I was so suggestive, all I had to do from my practice was say the word “relax” and I was completely weightless, and floating. I did not mind the contractions as much simply because the strength of them and my thoughts were instigating this blissful relaxation. My midwife had not yet arrived as my cervix reached 10 cm, and my husband and neighbor had just completed filling the tub. I went back into my head since I did not expect to be in the bath alone and I got scared. 

My Midwife and Doula arrived just before I felt the need to push. I let her know I was scared and she asked me of what. And I said of being alone. My husband was with me, the babysitter arrived and so did my caretakers. She only needed to say “You are not alone” and I was not alone. In the warmth of the tub, my husband was holding me, sharing our strength to birth our son. In the timelessness of following nature, I remember my midwife’s words as I fell into what seemed like a trance. She said, “Go with your body”, after I announced the urge to push. And I did. She said, “Open your pelvis and let the baby through.” And I did. She said, “Push past the burning ring.” And I did! My son was nearly 10 pounds. We brought him into this world without fear, and after only three hours of labor and 15 minutes of pushing, he arrived into our arms with a feeling of love that cannot be described. Perhaps it was the Oxytocin I heard so much about. Still, the experience was life changing. It gave me strength through the turbulent changes of the first weeks of post-partum and a feeling of empowerment that I can carry with me through life. This story of trust, birth and love has bonded us immediately as a family and I have no doubt this birth story will continue to shape our lives.

Love, Ruthie

Let Me Help You Create The Happiest Birth Experience Of Your Life...

Photo by Megan Hancock Photography

Whether you're a first time or experienced momma,

Or a midwife, doula, or birth professional guiding mommas..

Regardless if you are planning a birth at home, a hospital, a birth center or need a cesarean section, or if you are taking another childbirth education class…

You Really Can Create The Delivery Of Your Dreams.

And have a blissful birth wherever you are.

More Precious Than A Wedding...A Birth Should Be A Celebration!

Let me show you how to…

• Understand the sensations of your body and connect your intuition with how your body is communicating and leading you towards what to do during labor

• Tap into your inner calm to deeply relax yourself,letting go of busy, stressful and fearful thoughts on demand for the health of baby

• Speak your truth from your heart in a way that deepens your relationships, sets clear boundaries, and has people listen to you and support you before, during and after pregnancy

• Trust yourself, connect with your body wisdom and communicate with baby in belly

• Connect with natural time and sync your body and mind up with your unique biological clock for ease from pregnancy to postpartum

• Reprogram negative patterns, stories, and beliefs that undermine your confidence, strength and self trust so you can rock your birth

Physicians and midwives around the world recommend my teachings to their pregnant clients and many Doulas across the country learn the secrets of blissful birthing from me to supplement their Doula Training & Certification process!

To learn more, visit:  LOVE YOUR BIRTH Online Childbirth Course!

It is based on my years of experience, as a midwife and yoga teacher, helping thousands of women tap into their calm and live and birth from a place of grounded relaxation and joy. 

It’s wonderful alone, a great refresher or adjunct to any other course!

“Forget your childbirth class, and take steps to your most empowering experience. If you are thinking about conception, pregnant, or love someone who is, take it from me that her wisdom is life-changing.
Yours in the truth
”

— Kelly Brogan, MD

Welcome to my Online Health Dispensary

HEALTHY LIVING FOR HEALTHY WOMEN

My online dispensary is a convenient way for you to purchase my hand-picked, professional-grade, whole food supplements and other natural health products. Ordering is simple, and the products will be shipped directly to your home or work within a few days.

Click here to enter my dispensary at Fullscript.

I have listed my recommended prenatal and postpartum supplements in the PRENATAL SUPPORT and POSTPARTUM/BREASTFEEDING section, but you can search their catalog for other supplements and natural remedies as well.

You can also access your personalized prescriptions and dosage instructions for the products that have been recommended for you after a consultation.

Open an account - registration is free!