Becoming The Creator Of Our Pregnancy, Birth and Life

As featured in the Best Holistic Life Magazine….

The biggest act of self-love is to become the creator of our lives, not the victim; to take charge of our thoughts, emotions, reactions, behavior and habits that do not serve us; to take responsibility for our own health and well-being, not depend on others to do that for us. As a holistic nurse-midwife of 27+ years, self-love includes taking back our pregnancies, births, and health of our babies. This takes lots of work. But the reward is divine, sacred , empowering and transformative. You want to shout from the roof tops how incredible your experience was, how it moved you and your partner to tears and opened your hearts, that you DID it, you found your strength in the challenge – in the mountain that you felt too big to climb, and you birthed your baby as YOU wanted to. Your body worked to birth as your heart knows how to beat and your lungs know how to breathe.  You can draw on this power forever as you face other mountains that seem too high.

In the westernized early 1900s, healthy birth was moved out of the homes and normal family life, and taken over by hospital institutions and their providers; it was treated as an illness and stripped of humanity; our ability to give birth and experience it in its intensity, its raw realness and wondrous beauty, surrounded by the support and wisdom of our loved ones was robbed from us. We surrendered our autonomy, and harmful things were done to us in our most intimate areas, at our most vulnerable moments; we trust technology and modern medicine rather than ourselves and our healthy bodies innately wise ability to grow, birth and breastfeed our babies, and our healthy babies’ ability to be born and breastfeed. This caused high rates of birth trauma and worsening health outcome stats for mom and baby as compared to developed countries, among other concerning long term effects.

There is HUGE hope. That depends on YOU. It involves lots of preparing like you are running your marathon, educating and empowering yourself with knowledge; mastering coping and life enhancing techniques to practice so they become habitual; shifting your mindset, getting your modern mind out of the way so you can let you body do its thing; remembering what you forgot; going against your conditioning, going against the grain, your culture, your family and friends who may not understand, and joining a new rapidly growing community who are doing this with you around the world; being very selective about the provider and setting you choose to give birth, and respectfully speaking up for your rights as an autonomous human being. This may involve paying more money, but it’s worth every penny. The outcome is not only a healthy mind, body , heart and spirit for you, but also for your baby and your family, you will all treasure forever. You will have the experience of pregnancy and giving birth beyond your wild dreams, supported as you deserve postpartum – as we have been for thousands of years before. You will LOVE the experience in spite of its intensity and challenges. You will be so darn proud of yourself with a heart bursting with joy and gratitude.

It is SO possible. But YOU must be the change. I recently received an email from a mama who lives in a remote rural area. She had no option for her birth setting and provider other than a small local hospital with an obstetrician with unacceptable, extremely high rates of risky interventions and cesarean. She was inspired by my social media pages, devoured my book. She wanted a natural birth, a special peak life, family-centered experience that is inherent in bringing the new life of your own baby into the world. He said he did not practice that way, never saw natural birth and did not believe in it. She empowered herself further by taking my online course, presented him with her evidence based decisions and choices, and kindly insisted that he honor her wishes, to be there in the background, just in case, to do nothing but let her body go through its natural physiologic process without disturbing it. He finally agreed. She had her beautiful healthy birth and not only was she in heaven, but also her obstetrician was humbled and moved beyond words. What a ripple effect that will have on how he cares for others in his practice. That is how we improve birth and make needed change.

My gift to you to get you started is my free guide to planning your own birth mini course - with video and PDF download. My advice is to prepare like a boss so you can rock you birth in all settings. It takes work, but it is beyond worth it. Here are more resources I have for you. Each are different, and they are meant to be used in adjunct to one another. Many blessings on your journey of a lifetime!

Love Your Birth Course

$397.00

NEW! and IMPROVED, including an extra 20+ BONUS Videos!

Love Your Birth is a holistic, holistic midwife created, doctor recommended, on-demand course to help you birth YOUR way at home, birth center or hospital. Prepare for the most blissful experience from pregnancy to postpartum.

I’ve taken everything I’ve learned, trained and supported women with locally for over twenty years in my private practice and I’ve poured all of my love, passion, knowledge and experience into creating something truly special for you ... LOVE YOUR BIRTH!

10 core video modules with 13+ downloadable resources and packed with over 20 new BONUS videos and resources:

• Health In Pregnancy

• Preparing The Mind

• Testing Procedures

• Anatomy and Physiology

• Labor Coping Techniques

• Birth Preferences

• Guidance For Dads And Partners

• Postpartum - the 4th trimester

• Breastfeeding and Newborn Care

• Meditation, Breathwork, Visualization and Relaxation

  NEW! Over 20 Newly-Added BONUS Videos Where I Answer the Most Common Questions I am Asked, and Discuss Hot Topics Relevant to Your Journey.

  Value — Priceless :)

  The videos include discussions about such topics as:

• What to do when family and friends not supportive of your choices.

• Supplements in pregnancy.

• Prenatal yoga.

• VBAC (Vaginal Birth after Cesarean).

• Kids at birth.

• Friends and family at birth.

• Ideal Candidates for homebirth.

• How to have a homebirth like experience in the hospital.

• More on the placenta.

• How to deal when things don’t go as planned, and so much more!

The key to a positive birth, is feeling confident, strong, relaxed, and empowered during the entire process, regardless of the twists and turns it may take.

Photo Credit: Megan Hancock Photography

Add to Cart

A Walk With Anne - Tips & Insights on Holistic Pregnancy, Birth & Beyond Online Course

$77.00

Take a walk with me, Anne Margolis, where I talk on topics that matter to you on your journey of planning pregnancy, birth, postpartum and beyond.

Over 45 short, sharp video talks, covering:

Planning pregnancy

• What to do

• The preconception appointment

  Pregnancy

• How to find & choose a provider

• When to start prenatal care

• Elective testing

• Pep talk for first trimester feeling sick symptoms

• Group B Strep

• Internal exams

• Preventing late pregnancy panic & birth trauma

• Pep talk for going past due date

• What we can control & when we need to let go & flow

• What happens at the prenatal home visit when planning a homebirth

• How to know if your tub is good for water labor/birth

• Tub temperature, when to set up & get in

• Planning a homebirth & packing a hospital suitcase?

• Dealing with homebirth in apartments or with neighbors close by

• Postpartum prep

  Birth

• Fear of losing control

• Pep talk for second time mama birth fears

• How we can improve birth outcomes

• Why the name Home Sweet Homebirth for all settings

• Handling emergencies out of hospital - at home or birth center

• Need for advocacy in hospitals & why we must be the change

• Soothing nature and labor sounds

• Visual for birth

• Inspiration for your birth

• The huge gift in birth

• Dogs & cats at birth

• When to call your provider in labor - noticing stages & progression

• Early labor pep talk

• Pep talk for on and off or prolonged labor

• The post birth sacred pause

• Dealing with birth ‘mess’

• Planned unattended freebirth

• Some things we learn from animals

  Postpartum

• Preparation begins in pregnancy, what you need to do, what support is needed

• Dealing with emergencies - processing & healing afterwards

• Postpartum illness, depression/anxiety

• Gifts to give your midwife

  Holistic Health and Healing

• What is it?

• Importance of posture & improving it

• Pausing throughout the day

• Tools for hard days

• How to find your inner calm

• Transforming ‘what if’ thinking

• Meditation - why and how

• Self-care non-negotiables

Watch anywhere/anytime, on your PC, laptop, tablet or mobile.

Prenatal & Mindful Hatha Flow Yoga Class Series Online Course

$147.00

This course has 16 yoga classes plus bonus material:

• Seven ~ 60-80 minute Prenatal Yoga classes

• Seven ~ 60-80 minute Mindful Hatha Flow Yoga classes

• A soothing Gentle Slow Flow Yoga class

• A Restorative Yoga class for deep relaxation

• Bonus videos of an hour Live more advanced Vinyasa Class, shorter breaks of yoga anywhere anytime, use of props - like the wall, a chair, yoga blocks, yoga belts, yoga blankets and bolsters to enhance your practice, and practicing with your baby or pet.

The prenatal yoga 7 class series will invite you to grow, strengthen, focus, train and enhance your mind, body, heart and spirit. Discover for yourself the calming, healing and transformative power of yoga - intentional meditative movement with breath. Classes begin with meditation made simple using breathwork, gradual warm up, increasing difficulty as well as yoga play, gentle cool down, and end with restorative practices in deep relaxation. They are slow flowing, with space to explore specific poses but are meant to challenge you. Classes are different each session, with classical fundamental alignment based asana fused with modern postures and their many modifications and varied creative transitions. The classes are taught with modifications for pregnancy, incorporate positions for positively influencing baby’s position and active birthing as well as those to relieve common discomforts in pregnancy. They also are fused with meditative, breathwork and visualization techniques and tools for coping with and easing sensations of labor and birth, which will transform your childbirth experience with regular practice.

The seven classes are there for you to practice a different class each day of the week or according to your own frequency, then start over again from the beginning of the series. Each class ranges from on average 60 minutes to 80 minutes, and they build on each other; following the sequence from class 1 onward is advised if it is your first time taking the series or are a beginning practitioner. Classes are mindful, at a slow safe pace, gentle but challenging, so that you build strength, flexibility & agility. They start with the basics but are for all levels, and beginners too are welcome! If you are not pregnant, you can use the prenatal classes as beginner classes, just modify as needed and use any mention of pregnancy and labor as it pertains to any labor of your own life. The need to relax into intensity and the multiple benefits of yoga practice pertain to everyone. Or simply take the general Mindful Hatha Flow Yoga Class Series online course.

Once you hone your skills, you can take the Mindful Hatha Flow 7 Class Series that follows, doing your own modifications as needed - for pregnancy or wherever you are on your yoga journey, or simply start them after you are recovered postpartum. They also build on one another and can be practiced successively until you are ready to mix and match and create your own classes and practice schedule.

Additional videos are included to enhance your practice with use of the various props, as well as a soothing gentle slow flow class and a restorative yoga class for deep relaxation (great for evening!), shorter breaks of doing it anywhere and anytime, and a live bonus video of a more advanced class.

Add to Cart

Want a comprehensive holistic guide to the journey of getting pregnant, being pregnant, birth, breastfeeding, postpartum and beyond? Check out the second edition of my international and national best selling book Natural Birth Secrets.

Interview With a Family in My Practice on Their Podcast

“Julia and Gino were blessed to have Anne attend the birth of four of their children in the comfort of their home (they attribute Anne for saving Julia's life by detecting an ectopic pregnancy when the doctors did not!), and wanted to share with the community what an amazing midwife, mother, and entrepreneur Anne is.

In this week’s show, Anne discusses her passion for midwifery, what led her down the path of homebirth, the amazing power and joy of giving birth, and how her struggles in life led to her own transformative healing, growth, deeper joy and inner calm.

Anne draws parallels between raising a family and creating a successful in-person and online business, and how she did not set out to write two books or create online courses and coaching sessions, but a conversation with her daughter about joining Instagram changed it all. And then it grew organically.

Since that conversation, Anne has collected more than 97,000 followers on Instagram alone, and more importantly to her, has been able to serve mothers all over the world, including Australia and Europe.”

Source: Entrepreneur, Midwife, Author, and Mother, Anne Margolis with Julia and Gino Barbaro | Jake & Gino (jakeandgino.com)

Cesarean Birth and Prevention

Blog post featured image: Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

--- BEGIN TRANSCRIPT Instagram.com/homesweethomebirth ---

Hi. I wanted to come on and talk about cesarean and why I'm so passionate about preventing it. 

But what I want to mention first is that the rates in this country, in the United States, are going up and our outcomes are getting worse. Okay. The national average is 30%.

That's just unacceptable.

Some hospitals around where I live, the rate is 40 to 50%. Unbelievable. Why? There are so many reasons why, but I just want to share something with you.  

My rate is 5%. My rate of cesarean birth is 5%. I'm not bragging. This has nothing really to do with me. I, 

What's different. Why is that?

Why do you think the rates in my practice are 5%, and the rates in the national average of hospitals are 30% and climbing?

The families that come to my practice don't have different bodies. The people don't have different bodies. 

You know what's different. They're getting midwifery care.

They're getting midwifery care. They are low risk and healthy. And maybe someone even labeled them as high risk, but they're not really high risk. They're just healthy. They might have an issue or two, but you know what they're doing? They're taking responsibility. That's also what they're doing.

They're preparing as I recommend them to prepare, and they're taking responsibility for the birth, they're not just saying to me, do whatever, right. 

They are taking it upon themselves. 

Why do they need to prepare? I'll tell you why they need to prepare, because I know that women's bodies know exactly how to give birth. A healthy body knows how to give birth. Right? 

Why in the West do we need to prepare? Because we're in the West. We're in the Western culture.

I feel so strongly about this because I do hospital shifts. I do hospital shifts and I love to do hospitals shifts in hospitals that serve the immigrant populations.

I love that. And I can actually do prenatal care and help a mama in labor as much as possible with my heart and with my Spanish. Now I am not fluent, okay, but I love working with this community, the immigrant population that's coming up, because I'll tell you why. Not just, I love them, but the less Westernized they are, they don't need to take childbirth classes, they just come and birth just like that. 

And you know why? Because the newer they are to this country, the less westernized they are, they came from countries where they were surrounded by people having birth. And in a community. And the women in their community, the elders, the wiser ones would talk to them about it and they would see it. 

I mean, I just spoke with a grand-momma, an abuela, who had 11 babies in her casa - back in her country. 11 babies in her Casa. That's what everybody did.

She didn't need a childbirth course. She was surrounded by everybody doing that. So, she got that education, and she got that by osmosis, that “We know how to do this. This is what we know how to do". And you know what, it's hard, but we can do hard things. Like we don't need to numb ourselves from pain. They deal with pain. They just deal with it. The more westernized they are, the more we are in our brains, the more we are in fear. Not “we”. No, because I've healed myself, I've tried to de-Westernize myself when it comes to helping moms give birth.

And I feel strongly about this, because, we can't help the way of our culture. Okay. We get fear messages. Oh my gosh we get fear messages all over the media. You know, someone sees you're pregnant they're going to tell you a story. And we are addicted to Googling everything. We're just too much in our brains. It's just, it's just the way it is. We have to research this, we have to research that, and we have to numb. We're not comfortable with discomfort.

And that's why I love my yoga training. That taught me, that deep in yoga, to combine that with being a midwife is just an amazing combination. Yoga doesn't come from the West. It comes from the East. To be comfortable with uncomfortable. To be comfortable with discomfort. To be comfortable and relax into intensity. 

And I needed that to help me understand and how to help other people do that. But there are cultures around the world, here are countries around the world that never did any yoga. They just live in a community, and are surrounded by the elders and other women in the community. They just do it. You know, we do hard things. And we just give birth.

So, that’s why I think a huge part of the success of a lot in my practice, and a lot of my colleagues, is that we're really are, to the families that have a baby in the home, in our practice are Westernized. They might want to have a home birth, but it's their first time, they know nothing about birth. They haven't been around it. 

They tell me they don't know anybody that's had a home birth that I can connect them with. Well, I know tons of people that have had a home birth.

So, that's why I love connecting moms and their partners, so that they don't feel so isolated. But a lot of times the families that come to me, their parents gave birth in hospitals with all kinds of interventions and they just, they feel very isolated and unprepared. And, and just looking at videos and pictures, scrolling down, on Instagram is not the way to prepare. I'm sorry. It's not. And that's why I really think a lot of the success comes from myself and my colleagues really being insistent that the family who comes in to have a home birth is going to prepare like a boss, right? 

Get de-Westernized, get primal and get sensual, and learn how to relax into intensity and learn about birth because no one ever taught you. Right. And learn the techniques that you need to do to master your calm. And, and to just let your body do it. And, and I think that's a huge part of our success. 

I track my stats, and unfortunately the 7% of times that I have to go into the hospital, it's not because of an emergency. Emergencies are rare. We deal with them, or I can count them on my hand.

I'm the EMT. The midwife is the EMT at the birth. We prevent and we deal with any problems that come up. And if we need to go to the hospital, we need to go to the hospital.

But that's 7% of the time. That means 93% are having births at home.

But who is my 7% that needs to go to the hospital?
It tends to be, and I track my statistics. I've been tracking them for years. It's people with long, stuck labors, first time birthers, first time vaginal birthers, who did not prepare.

They just didn't want to take a course, they were preparing on Instagram or they, or they just weren't preparing at all before Instagram.

You can't prepare on Instagram. You have to take a class today. Yes. In the West. You have to take a class, unless your mom and your grandparents have given birth at home, and you're surrounded by, natural birth. Because natural birth in the West is very different. It's a very different experience if you've never done it before and you can't prepare on social media. Okay? 

Then, you have to think about who are you going to, who are you going to - let's say you want a natural birth. Well, if the hospital or the provider that you're going to is, let's say you're healthy and you want a natural birth, if the hospital and the provider that you're going to doesn't do natural birth. They're not into it. They weren't trained in it. They're into interventive birth, it's going to be very hard for you to have a natural birth, right? And one intervention leads to another intervention, leads to the other intervention, and unfortunately ends up in too much intervention and complications and cesarean births. 

I am so grateful for cesarean births for when it's necessary and that's why I post on it. And yes, we could have gentle cesareans for those mamas. Five percent - they're still human beings, and that's still a birth, and those mamas are rockstars because they need to have a compassionate, human, respectful family centered, gentle cesarean, and we can have as much as possible that home-sweet-home birth in the hospital or in the operating room, but we still have to prevent. 

So, you have to think about – even if you want a vaginal birth - let's say you want an epidural - if you want a vaginal birth, you have to know. Ask “What's the rate of cesareans in your hospital?”. Is it 30%? Is it 40%? Is it 50%? Then it's very unlikely - unless you prepare. Then have to prepare even more, right, to fight that system. Because, I don’t know, I talk about this all the time and I'm so passionate about it because I think that's how we make the change. 

How we be the change, how we make the change, is for you all to prepare yourselves and take back your birth and know what setting and what provider you're going to. 

And if you are blessed, if you're healthy, or you have a little issue or two, that doesn't risk you out of midwifery care. Find a midwife. 

That's the model of care in a lot of countries where the midwives who are trained. You know, I have seven years of training, it's not just a weekend course. I had to get my bachelor's, and I got my master's, and where I live, I need a master's degree. I have seven years of training and education, and it's specifically focused on supporting the low risk healthy.

Yes, we screen, we prevent, and we look. That's what prenatal care is all about, that relationship, and making sure that it is still safe and appropriate for that mama to have a home birth, or a birth with a midwife in the hospital. 

But midwifery, our specialty, is supporting normal. Keeping it normal. Lay low on intervention. No intervention. No interventions necessary when it's working well. 

What's an obstetrician? What's an OB/GYN. Do you know the difference? There’s a huge difference, and we need them, thank god, but an obstetrician and a gynecologist, OB/GYN, goes to medical school and does residency and extra training for high-risk pregnancies and surgery, to use very highly sophisticated technology to diagnose and treat high-risk situations, medically or surgically. But that kind of provider, I have doctors, I love the obstetricians that I work, but they always tell me they know nothing about natural birth. They're bored of it. They don't know what to do. They love the midwives. If someone's healthy, they say “you're going to get better care with a midwife”. 

So, it's very important for you to know the difference between a midwife and an obstetrician, their training and their background, because if you want a surgical birth, then no, you don't go to a midwife – go to a surgeon.

And that's what an obstetrician and gynecologist, OB/GYN is. And we need them. 

And that's why there are certain countries, that's why the United States ranks the lowest among all developed countries in the world, in terms of maternal and newborn outcomes. We're losing more babies and mamas, or having more serious complications with mamas and babies, than all the other developed countries in the world.

The countries that have the best outcomes are countries where, like Sweden, there's a lot of countries where everybody sees a midwife, if they're healthy. The doctor (obstetrician) is there for the high risk. High-risk and when surgery is needed. When medicine and surgery is needed. 

And that's how we serve the whole population of people having babies, and that's how we get excellent outcomes - live, happy, healthy mamas and babies. 

So last week I talked about a bleeding in pregnancy - this week I thought I'd talk about this.

If you found that helpful, comment, share. I'd love to hear what you have to say, but that's all for now. 

Have a wonderful weekend. Bye.

--- END TRANSCRIPT ---

Plan like a Boss! Create your ideal birth plan and take back your birth!

Feel empowered and prepared for your childbirth experience and all the possible interventions you need to make decisions about - whether you are planning to birth in the hospital, birthing center or home setting! :)

Creating your ideal birth plan with this FREE video and ebook guide will not only help you prepare in advance, it will:

• help you speak up for what you want and what you do not want

• provide the keys to prevent high rates of unnecessary, risky medical and surgical interventions and birth trauma, and

• coach you about the hows and whys, and some great recommendations for helping you design the birth of your dreams!

This is the special guide that I give to each family in my practice, that has been refined and refined over the many years of practice, brought to life in an updatable, printable and shareable guide.

Then use these different but crucial resources to prepare like a boss! Prevent that first cesarean or plan your VBAC! It takes work and is worth every penny, but this is your and your baby’s health and life we are protecting.

Love Your Birth Course

$397.00

Add to Cart

A Walk With Anne - Tips & Insights on Holistic Pregnancy, Birth & Beyond Online Course

$77.00

Add To Cart

Get a comprehensive holistic reference guide to the journey of getting pregnant, being pregnant, birth, breastfeeding, postpartum and beyond. Check out the second edition of my international and national best selling book Natural Birth Secrets.

Getting Real With A Mama in My Practice Who Rocked Her VBAC

Part one and two of a an awesome video I was invited to do with Joni, a mama in my practice who had a homebirth birth after cesarean, that really brings together many things pregnancy, birth, and breathwork, holistic health and healing.

Learn how to rock your VBAC and have the birth of your dreams with these three different but crucial resources - so you can prepare like a boss!

Love Your Birth Course

$397.00

Add to Cart

A Walk With Anne - Tips & Insights on Holistic Pregnancy, Birth & Beyond Online Course

$77.00

Add To Cart

Get deep in this childbearing bible, a reference guide for the whole journey from planning a pregnancy, expecting, birth, postpartum and newborn care, with effective holistic modalities for common discomforts and issues along the way.

Natural Remedies and Resources for Stress in Pregnancy and Beyond

Pregnancy can be an emotional rollercoaster, a time of increased sensitivity, and life circumstances often feel heightened. However, there is a wide variety of natural remedies and resources to help steady moods and enjoy the beautiful experience of pregnancy. The below recommendations will not only assist with stress relief during pregnancy, but during many stages of life. Also, do check out a recent related blog where I talk about 40 wonderful ways you can manage the powerful waves of emotions in pregnancy and beyond.

SUPPLEMENTS

For general health and physical and emotional well-being during pregnancy, make sure to eat healthy foods, stay well hydrated, and take supplements to make sure you supply yourself with needed nourishment not supplied by diet alone. Take:

• A whole food prenatal multivitamin with minerals

• Fish oil tested free of pollutants, for omega three essential fatty acids, 1000-2000 mg 1-2 times daily 

• Calcium, 250-500mg 2-3 times daily

• Magnesium, 200-500mg 2-3 times daily

• Vitamin B complex, 20-50 mg daily

• Vitamin D, 1000 -2000 units per day, more if low blood levels

• An excellent mega probiotic once daily

Get screened for iron deficiency anemia, which is common in later pregnancy, as it can exacerbate your emotional symptoms and is easy to treat. If you are prone to low iron levels, since it is almost impossible to get the necessary amount of iron in pregnancy from diet alone, you may want to prevent anemia early on by taking an herbal iron supplement like Floradix Iron tablets or in liquid.

MINDFULNESS

A wonderful life-changing approach to internal stress, feelings of depression and anxiety is learning about present moment awareness and mindfulness, and incorporating it into your daily life.

Try to make a conscious effort to increase feelings of forgiveness, appreciation, love, joy, optimism and healing, while letting go of anger, resentment, envy, fear, sadness and negativity. Most importantly, increase your awareness of anxiety provoking, tension causing, or depressive thought patterns that are not serving you. Try to shift your attention to something more positive and ultimately change your mental state. You can actually transform them at their deeper subconscious roots with Clarity breathwork. 

Know that you are in charge of your feelings and how you react to stressful or painful situations, and that you have the ability to change your attitude and reaction to life experiences to more health enhancing responses. For example, you can surrender to and totally accept unpleasant life events over which you have no power. You can also view them as potential gifts, powerful stimulus to change, a wake-up call, an opportunity for personal growth, redirection and spiritual practice. 

You can always try to focus as much attention as possible on the now, literally without letting your thoughts wander and dwell into the past or imagined future. Mastery over your thoughts, attitudes and reactions can have a dramatic impact on your brain chemistry, balancing the hormones responsible for affecting moods and emotions, and preventing and even treating clinical depression and anxiety.

Reduce feelings of tension and increase feelings of calm centeredness and balanced grounding by taking a “healing interval” to meditate for 10-20 minutes 2-3 times per day. Sit comfortably and quietly. Keep your eyes closed and internally focused between your eyebrows or softly gazing at a low, still object or place (like where the floor meets the wall). Turn off the mental noise and think and do absolutely nothing. Simply be aware of your breathing in all its details, the present moment and everything that you notice within it. If you get lost in thought, simply bring your attention back to watch your breath.

Tap into your spiritual self and practice slow deep abdominal breathing, yoga (especially Yin, prenatal, gentle and restorative), QiGong, Tai Chi, progressive muscle relaxation techniques (yoga nidra), visualization and guided imagery, or cutting edge stress reduction audio programs and courses. For example, imagine you are in a place where you feel whole, inner joy and peace, and spiritually connected. Or think of a healing or rejuvenating spiritual energy or light flowing through and around you. This is an essential, yet easy to learn, tool with endless benefits and rewards to your physical and emotional health. Locate your nearest Zen Center (Zen is NOT a religion and does not conflict with any religion) or read any book by Thich Nhat Hanh, Pema Chodron, or Shunryu Suzuki to learn the basics of meditation and Zen practice.

Make sure you are getting enough sleep at night, and rest during the day. Listen closely to your body’s messages. You may need to either slow down or become more busy with things that bring you deeper satisfaction and enrichment. You may need more time for yourself, or you may need to focus more on giving or helping others. It is extremely beneficial to find a small way to help someone in need each day, by giving your time, energy and presence to ease the burden and increase the happiness of even one person. Focus on connections with family and friends, healing relationships, making peace and giving love.

Minimize or avoid watching and reading the news, or take periodic news fasts. Unplug from the computer and smart phone as much as possible, especially reduce time spent on addictive programs and apps (including computer games, social media, and even email) as they increase inner stress, anxious feelings, impair well-being, and cause a variety of health issues. Empower yourself to listen to your body and choose limited times and online activities you enjoy or absolutely need to do. For additional information and guidance, read “How to Break Up With Your Phone: The 30 Day Plan to Take Back Your Life,” by Catherine Price.

BREATHWORK

Start with being breath awareness - being more conscious about your breath, and simply focusing all of your attention on your breathing. Get curious about all the details of your sensations as you inhale and exhale, without trying to change anything. Notice what you are currently seeing, hearing, smelling, feeling, tasting. Just watch without judgment. This brings you to the present and is deliciously relaxing. 

Before going to bed at night, as well as before rising in the morning, periodically throughout the day, and whenever you feel stressed, triggered, down or upset, practice the following 3-part breathing exercise: 

1. Exhale slowly through your mouth with an audible sigh while consciously releasing any and all muscle tension.

2. Imaging a pump expanding your abdomen and lower back as you breathe down deep into your belly.

3. Allow ribs to expand with air, then inhale air into your upper chest towards your collar bone and shoulders 

4. Inhale in this way for a count of 4.

5. Hold for a count of 4 while staying relaxed.

6. Exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 4, releasing in the same order as the inhale, collapsing/returning to baseline, your abdomen, ribs, then upper chest. This is the ideal form of breathing, as opposed to rapid shallow breathing. With each exhale, let go and relax more. 

7. Repeat this cycle a total of 8 times or at least a few minutes. 

Once you get the hang of it, play with various types of breathing. Try  several minutes of inhaling and exhaling, each to a count of 3, 4, 5 or 6 without the hold, keeping it smooth and even. Then double the length of exhalation. For example, so if you inhale to a count of 3, then exhale to a count of 6. 

See how it feels to triangle breathe for a few minutes. Inhale for a count of 3 or 4, exhale to the same count of 3 or 4, then pause for the same count of 3 or 4, while consciously and deeply relaxing your diaphragm muscle of respiration, as well as all other muscles. Repeat for several cycles.

Then see how it feels to box breathe. To do this, inhale to a count of 3, hold for a count of 6, exhale for a count of 6, hold for a count of 3. Repeat for several minutes. Many love this type of breathing so much they do it as often as they can, such as while waiting, in transit, before rising in the morning and going to sleep at night. 

These are wonderful natural tranquilizers, especially if you do it often. While breathing, be mindful and just observe and release any muscle tension working your way slowly from head to toe, and then be mindful of what you are currently seeing, hearing, smelling, feeling, tasting (just watch without judgment …this brings you to the present and is wonderfully relaxing). You do this and you are getting the benefits of both slow deep breathing and meditation.

Another great breathwork technique that disengages your conscious attention from thought and relaxes the nervous system, and can be done any time (like when traveling, waiting in line, resting, bathing, or on the toilet) is forced exhalation. After a normal breath, try squeezing as much air out as possible using your intercostal muscles, then allow breath to come in naturally and deeply, but automatically. Repeat the cycle for several minutes.

These breathwork techniques are simple to do, health enhancing, totally safe, and without side effects. If you need more personal guidance, schedule a session with me. 

LEARNING MATERIALS

For more information about thought and emotional mastery, and other great ways to improve your overall well-being, read more from the variety of resources below. Make a commitment to practice and transform your life for the better. It is beyond worth it to feel your absolute best. There are amazing books about miraculous tools to remedy wounds from the past, relieve internal stress, tap into your inner power and basically heal almost all stress-related problems of the heart, mind and body to live a vibrant, joyful life.

Some great books include: 

Just Breathe by Dan Brule  

Breath Love  by Lauren Chelec Cafritz

Breathe Deep Laugh Loudly by Judith Kravitz

Conversations with the Goddesses by Agapi Stassinopoulos

Pussy: A Reclamation by Regina Thomashauer

Practicing the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

From Panic to Power by Lucinda Bassett

Change Your Thoughts Change Your Life by Wayne Dyer

Loving What Is by Byron Katie

Full Catastrophe Living by John Kabat-Zinn

Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach 

True Refuge by Tara Brach

Accomplishing More by Doing Less by Marc Lesser Book

The Journey: A Practical Guide to Healing Your Life and Setting Yourself Free by Brandon Bays

Natural Health, Natural Medicine by Dr Andrew Weil

A Mind of Your Own: The Truth About Depression and How Women Can Heal Their Bodies to Reclaim Their Lives by Dr. Kelly Brogan

Own Your Self: The Surprising Path beyond Depression, Anxiety, and Fatigue to Reclaiming Your Authenticity, Vitality, and Freedom by Dr. Kelly Brogan 

Websites

drwaynedyer.com for more resources from Dr Wayne Dyer.

thework.com for more from Byron Katie, about loving what is.

stresscenter.com to learn about Attacking Anxiety and Depression, a Self-Help, Self-Awareness Program.

behavioraltech.org to locate a cognitive behavioral therapist closest to you.

mbct.com for resources and info on a proven mindfulness-based cognitive approach to feelings of chronic unhappiness and depression.

mindfullivingprograms.com offers courses using the mindfulness-based stress reduction program (MBSR).

drweil.com to learn more from one of the founding fathers of integrative medicine - merging complimentary alternative health care with science addressing the mind, body, heart and spirit.

avivaromm.com is an excellent resource for herbs and natural remedies for common aliments facing women and children, including depression and anxiety, by renowned midwife, physician and herbalist, who bridges traditional wisdom with modern medicine.

neuroassist.com provides information regarding amino acid support for emotional health.

thejourney.com offers retreats and local practitioners teaching deeply awesome and extremely effective mindbody approaches to health.

kellybroganmd.com for wonderfully effective holistic and integrative psychiatric approaches to mental wellness without medication.

mamagenas.com the official site for Mama Gena’s School of the Womanly Arts, leader of a global movement to reclaim the feminine, helping countless women to reclaim their power, feel exquisitely comfortable within their bodies and souls, and live with radiant pleasure.

Ibfbreathwork.org the international organization for conscious breathing and breathwork for optimal health and well-being. This site also lists local practitioners and retreat workshops that are extremely transformational and profoundly healing for thousands and thousands of people around the world.

HERBAL STRESS RELIEF

Most of the supplements and herbal remedies I recommend are available on my customized online holistic apothecary. Find the best supplements that have gone through my thorough screening process there. Look in the category for mental/emotional well-being or search them individually. My online dispensary is a convenient way for you to purchase my hand-picked, professional-grade, whole food supplements and other natural health products. Ordering is simple, and the products will be shipped directly to your home or work within a few days.

Herbs are mentioned last, as they can be used as supportive to your personal growth and self mastery efforts and, except for nourishing tonics, are for short term use only. For best results, they should not be relied upon alone, used without the above mentioned techniques. Inner peace and happiness are an inside job. 

Drink Red Raspberry leaf, Skullcap, Motherwort, Chamomile, Lemon balm and/or Lavender tea to relax you. Peppermint or Spearmint tea will lift your spirits.  You can make a lovely calming infusion, which is more effective than the ready made teas, by mixing a pinch of each dried herb: chamomile, lavender and lemon balm. Add to 1 cup boiling water, steep covered in a glass mason jar for 15-20 minutes, strain, add lemon, fresh mint or honey to taste, and drink. 

Nettle and Dandelion are common herbs recommended in pregnancy to take as a nourishing tonic, but they are also wonderful for regulating blood sugar, supporting the adrenals, improving nutrient intake and building iron levels. In turn, this can balance your emotions, lessen mood swings and irritability.

To make an infusion:

1. Soak a handful of each dried herb in 1 quart of boiling water for 3-4 hours.

2. Strain in a mason glass canning jar.

3. Add lemon or lime juice, fresh mint or honey to taste.

4. Drink 1-3 cups per day. 

Nettle and Dandelion can also be taken as a tincture, 1 dropperful each 3-4 times daily.

Oatstraw works best to nourish and calm the nervous system when taken over time. You can add a generous pinch of the dried herb to the infusion above. Or, take 1 dropperful of the tincture of fresh creamy milky oat tops in its most potent form 1-2 times daily.

Motherwort is great for occasional use after the first trimester, to help restore emotional balance when feeling stressed, restless, irritable, or overwhelmed. Take 1/2 -1  dropperful of the tincture. Repeated if needed every 15-30 minutes for 3 hours or up to 2-3 times daily for 2-3 days.

Skullcap has a similar effect as Motherwort, but more helpful to calm, and can be used regularly. Take ½ - 1 dropperful of tincture a few times per day. Both Skullcap and Motherwort are helpful to have on hand in labor as well as postpartum.

Passionflower is a great herb to take when feeling cranky, short tempered, anxious or experiencing frequent changes of mood. Try ½-1 dropperful of the tincture or 2 capsules of standardized extract up to 3 times per day as needed.

Reishi Mushroom is an excellent natural remedy for stress and anxiety. It is calming and also helps with sleep. Take 1-2 capsules up to three times daily. 

Valerian can be taken on occasion, especially if you can not fall asleep at night because of feeling stressed or anxious. Take 2 capsules of standardized extract or one dropperful of the tincture in juice to help with taste.

CBD from hemp oil. This is the new rage, as it is gently calming, relieves anxiety and helps with sleep without the potential risks of the THC component of cannabis on the developing fetus. Results from anecdotal evidence and preliminary research, although sparse (as is common with most natural remedies in pregnancy), are promising. Make sure it is absolutely pure, and from a reputable source who can recommend proper dosing or from pharmacies licensed to dispense it. It is usually taken as several drops under the tongue.

Bach Flower Rescue Remedy can be used in temporary stressful situations, 4-6 drops every 10-15 minutes for a few hours.  Repeat as needed. There are many flower essences effective and safe for specific transient emotional symptoms on an energetic level, developed by physician Dr. Bach. If you are interested in exploring this modality, get yourself a wonderful reference and a a starter kit for you to use now and beyond for your growing family.

Homeopathic remedies are wonderfully safe and effective for relieving emotional stresses and imbalances. You can consult a classical homeopath, or refer to books like Homeopathy For Pregnancy, Birth and Your Baby’s First Year by Miranda Castro.

Dr. Aviva Romm advises in “The Natural Pregnancy Book” taking a small dose of American Ginseng, Schisandra Berries and Eleuthero, 1/2 tsp each alone or total in combination 2 times per day to nourish your adrenals especially if you are overtired, burned out, overworked or overstressed. I would say it is best to avoid them in the first trimester. See her recent more comprehensive blog on remedies to support your adrenals in stressed modern times.

St. John’s Wort can help relieve mild to moderate depression. Take it if you are not pregnant (although if you are expecting, it may be a safer alternative than the common antidepressant prescription medications, to take in consultation with your provider).  Dr. Andrew Weil advises 300 mg three times per day of an extract standardized to 0.3 % hypericin. Allow at least 2 months for the full effect, and minimize sun exposure if you develop a photosensitivity reaction. 

SAMe is another natural remedy for mild to moderate depression and/or anxiety. Dr. Andrew Weil recommends the butanedisulfonate form, in enteric coated capsules or tablets, 400–1600 mg. per day on an empty stomach. 

If not pregnant, lavender Oil can be taken one capsule before sleep for the occasional bout of insomnia or anxiety. You can try Blue Vervain, 1/2 to one dropperful 1-3 x daily. Also take Rhodiola - as a tonic herb for mild depression, anxiety and stress, 100-200 mg twice daily. Choose an extract standardized to 2-3% rosavins and 0.8-1% salidrosides. This usually improves anxiety and sleep, but needs to be taken more regularly. Obviously stop it if it is too stimulating and worsens insomnia. You can also try Ashwagandha, if you feel overstressed and burned out. Dissolve 1-2 tsp of the powder in your smoothie, tea or warm milk for 5-10 minutes 2-3 times per day. Or, take 2-3 dropperfuls of the tincture twice daily and before sleep, or 2-5 grams of the capsules daily in divided doses.  One of my favorite remedies for calming anxiety and inner stress related insomnia is Kava Kava. You can take a few drops up to a dropperfuls of the tincture or 150 -450 mg of the encapsulated liquid capsules before bed for occasional short term use only. Do not use if you are taking any substance including alcohol or medications that affect the liver, or you have any liver issues. This is one of my favorite herbs for anxiety and/or insomnia from inner stress and is usually well tolerated and very effective.

Dr. Aviva Romm is an excellent resource for herbs and natural remedies for depression and anxiety, and if you are struggling with psychological symptoms, integrative holistic psychiatrist Dr. Kelly Brogan’s online course and associated resources are a must.

Contact your provider if these suggestions do not help and your negative emotions are persistent and becoming too frequent or strong to cope with, especially if you:

• Have a history of depression or anxiety needing prescription medication

• Are having trouble functioning

• Are eating or sleeping too much or too little

• Have frightening thoughts

• Experience severe oscillation of moods between wild elation and despair

• Feel at risk for harming yourself or others

Such severe symptoms require psychiatric evaluation and often medication to prevent or treat a more serious illness. However, try to avoid mind-altering drugs and medications (such as sedatives, tranquilizers, sleeping pills, antihistamines and steroids) unless absolutely and medically necessary.

Do not take any herb or medication before discussing it with your provider, as many are not safe for use in pregnancy. Do not take any prescription anti-anxiety or anti-depressant drug unless you are really suffering and none of these suggestions help, and you are closely supervised by your psychiatrist.

Check out my number one international best selling book Natural Birth Secrets second edition, and in adjunct, my Love Your Birth course, an online version of how I have helped thousands in my local practice. Both resources are unique, but each provide an in depth, one-of-a-kind holistic approach created by me, a seasoned nurse midwife of over two decades, who has seen everything! In both you will learn how to master your inner calm for pregnancy, labor, birth and life beyond.

For more information on having the pregnancy, birth and postpartum experience of your dreams, check out my Love Your Birth Online Course.